ad couple of weeks

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sorry this is a bit of a moan

i've been on my last 14 week placement now for 6 weeks, due to loos;ley ward circumstnaces and too many students i haven't had a proper mentor that ive workd with at least 40% of my shift regualry. I'm ona spinal injuries surgurical ward very specialised and busy and seems no one has time to teach and even less time to support a student who is due to qualify in less than 8 weeks. I ended up crying today due to really working with one person no one knows what i'm up to what is safe to be delegated to me and what i still need closer superivison with. I feel that i've not progresed bar working on my handover skills and that i've acquired i persitely asking what i'm working with that can i have 2 bed and that i'll manage these and hand them over and i recongised this weakness. I was working with a SN today who previous iv.e been anxious around, and when i;m anxious i have a habit of making mistakes, and who i sense has limites condifence in my abilites due to making mistakes. for some reason this all affected me and i knew i was feeling low and might cry so i had nipped off the ward on my break to have a breathar. I was doing obs on transfer and she asked me if for time management sake that she would nip round with the 12am meds contray to a plan that i would do them superivised. and felt my lip trembling as i welled up by a bedside with a this sn who noticed. her following actions were nice she took me inot the staff room and talked to me and i was able to expressed some of my fears/concerns about not knowing how i was doing/(i can be overly self critiacl) lack of feedback lack of constiently and got the ward manager in. I finished on a medical ward previously, feeling confident with newly developing management skills and what my aims were and what i needed to do to be fit for practice, and that a very good mentor and excellent nurse trusted my abilites to increase my independence with some aspect of the role but always had been there for support and guidance. now i feel i've taken a step back. i said to the ward manager and sn that one of my aims is to develop my time management skills which i got tool comes this experiences and some sn don't have it, this is a fair enough comment from someone with much more experience than me however i didn't say as i was upset but i personally felt that this was one aspect i feel i need to work on and telling me others haven't got it is neither here nor there. my official mentor is the junior sister but i've worked 2 shifts with her and she get called away into ward management stuff.

i am scared i won't pass i have said i need feedback and perhaps now a plan will occur. i should have addressed this earlier but was trying to direct my own learning and see how i was doing. getting low over it all

but i've worked so hard to achieve skills in clinical practice and yet feel like jacking it in, but i so don't want to and i want to be a rn.

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Specializes in Dialysis, Nephrology & Cosmetic Surgery.

I don't really know how to comment on your experience as my experience as a stdent nurse was so different. I started nurse training in the late 80s and from day one was part of the ward establisment, counted in the numbers and from very early on was expected to take charge of a team. The nurse training changed drastically - students were supernumery and this was all intended to allow students to observe and be supervised more. I actually feel it has had an adverse effect and I think todays students are disadvantaged.

It can be very difficult working on a speciality especially after you have had such a positive experience on your previous ward. I remember how different it felt as a student going to a speciality ward after doing my "general" allocations. I don't mean any disrespect to any particular area but I also appreciate that some specialist areas seem to be intimidating and sometimes are overwhelming for students. It is only after you qualify and gain experience and confidence that you can take these things in your stride.

I hope you can resolve your anxieties and settle into your final weeks, I'm sure you are learning and gaining from this placement but as you are approaching qualifying you are bound to feel anxious.

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Specializes in Advanced Practice, surgery.

Ayla it is natural that you are going to be feeling anxious in your final bit, I have followed what you have been doing and where you were in your training with great interest because of the enthusiasm you clearly demonstrate. The Tuesday Chats that we had the chat room, I think were very telling about the type of student you are and the type of nurse you will be. You have always been keen and enthusiastic to learn, you question what you are unhappy with and try to further your knowledge at every opportunity. You are an advocate for your patients and I would have no problem in having you work with the team of nurses I manage, because you ask questions and know your limits.

Time management is something that you will struggle with, it is something that I struggled with for many years after qualifying because it is something that you can only learn with experience. Please don't get too stressed about it, even when you qualfiy you will still be learning and from what I have seen about you, you will learn.

You are an excellent student, this is clear from your posts, comments and chat. I have no doubt you WILL BE AN EXCELLENT R.N.

If you were not suitable to be a nurse you would not have got as far as you have. I appreciate that things on your ward may not be ideal and it is such a shame that your last placement as a student be one that causes you such anxiety.

Having chatted to you and read your posts and questions, I can only come to the conclusion that you are going to be an asset to any nursing team that you join.

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thanks for your feedback

went in today on a late and in a way was aprehensive never before have i broken down in placement and not been able to contain it till i was home away from staff. Going through my mind on the way into work was this is a close knit ward with some discretion other staff members bar the SN and manager may know some aspects of what has occurred and while they now know what i think/feel which is good i hope i'm not seen as fragile and get teated differently. well i think something has been communicated. I was working with an experienced staff nurse this afternoon and while i looked after a young man who came back from theater she said she just wanted to check for herself some neuro assessments this was in a very gentle voice.

one other postive note from yesterday was on commencing duty that morning the ward manager had asked when i was free that she wanted a chat. I felt like i was being called into the prinicples office and this was playing on my mind during begining of the shift and parteil thei worry may have played a role in the waterworks. instead it was about how a SN had sn snapped at me in the ward office and was i ok. this lead toa general chat about how i was doing (all pre break down) whereby i said that one skill i was acquriung was handover that i felt my first attempts i was nervous panicked and had no structure to the information i relayed.

This i explained lead me to got home think about what I felt that if i was the oncoming nurse what i would like to be told and i create a plan which i read out to the ward manager she said was good and she mentioned that she had been listening to handover lately and felt that they was a lack of structure and some key information was being left out EWS espically.

one thing i now know and feel is what a previous placement sister said that as a newly qual i would do better in a supportive environmnet. i will fingers crossed make it. its frigthening as a 3rd who was aware of gaps in knowlege however being confronted with that some gaps are so big 747 could fly through. A first year st/n was saying she liked surgical wards as medical was boring as you do the same thing every day she did say even surgical can be repeative. whereas I'm trying to test my abilities and gear up even a medical ward would have new skills to develop in management.

so im feeling a little better sometimes a good cry works wonders

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Specializes in Advanced Practice, surgery.

I'm glad your feeling a little better Ayla and it sounds like the ward manager gave you some constructive feedback. If there is anything you think we can help with please give us a shout

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not sure

have emailed the uni tutor who is the link and has a spinal injuries background.

As the yanks would say the acutity on the ward is very high at the minute of 17 beds only 2-3 are reasonably independent with needs. I've ever seen so much controlled drugs given out anywhere. however i've stopped feeling bad if buzzer rings if I'm with a patient or cleaning up after a shower etc i'll finish one task at a time, but will normally stop paperwork. At least now both the ward and the .

uni know i have some concerns about how i will be supported.

another moan it just having to fight not making me low in mood

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