A Question About Post Mortum Expectations

I have been an on-call nurse making several death calls a week for several months now and I rarely see a patient who has emptied their bowels at their time of death, I've seen it in maybe 10-20% of my patients. I'm not sure if I'm the exception or not, but that's what I see most of the time.

If you are really concerned about this, then why not put a brief on him? If he is already experiencing terminal congestion, and from your description it sounds like he is, then it won't be long. I would put a brief on him. If the sight of a brief bothers your grandmother then keep the blankets over him, but I think that if he does move his bowels when he dies that it would be much more stressful for her if it is all over the bed and his legs than contained in a brief. I hope that's not too graphic, but it's the only way I could think of to describe it.

I'm very sorry about your grandpa. I hope that he passes quickly and painlessly when the time comes. I will say a prayer for you and your grandma.

i agree with westieluv's advice.

my only question is if your grandma intends to participate in postmortem care?

i've had sev'l family members who want to, and along with assisting them, i also warn them of cavities possibly emptying themself.

prayers for peace for your grandpa, and healing for your grandma.

leslie

I had have a question about end-of-life care that maybe someone can answer. I'm a Jr BSN student, and am currently watching my grandfather as he dies from stage 5 melanoma. The edema is seeping into his lungs, and I can hear the breath sounds change as his death draws nearer. He will soon drown in his own fluid...

My family is asking many questions, but the one I do not know, nor can I find the answer to, is how quickly after his death can we expect his bowels to evacuate? He has a Foley cath, but is not wearing Depends or anything, and we want to prevent my grandma from witnessing him having a bowel movement if possible.

Thanks guys.

This is a difficult time for you and your family just now...

First, make sure that the hospice team knows about the pulmonary congestion! He will not drown in his own fluid.

Make your grandfather comfortable. It is unlikely that your grandfather will make any large embarrassing mess, but it is wise to put a pad under him. I would bet that he has eaten very little in the past few days...this may have troubled you or other family members. Now you can see that this is the natural process...there is little in the bowel, and the motility is slowed, so evacuation surrounding time of death is not common in hospice.

If your grandfather is like so many elderly men I have met; he loves his wife and family, has made his peace with God, and is content to let it be...

Best wishes.

Thanks to all of you for your advice and prayers!

My grandpa breathed his last breath at 8 this morning. Things went as comfortably as possible, and we did not have any problem with an embarrassing mess. All the family was present at the bedside when he went to be with the Lord.

My grandpa is now in peace, and at home with the Lord. He was a devout Christian, and my family has been covered in many prayers. The Lord is giving us peace beyond understanding.

Thanks, again for your responses.

It sounds like your grandpa had as close to a "perfect" death as could have been hoped for, which is awesome. I share your faith and I am so glad that you have the reassurance that he is in a better place. God bless you and your family as you adjust to life without him, especially your grandma.

Thank you very much for your encouragement. God truly is giving us peace about the situation, but he will be missed by many people.