Anyone else feel it can get a bit lonely being a male nurse? I dont like to use that term at all.. but am refering to males in nursing, so i guess it fits?
All day long i hang out with really nice women, who totally don't understand me. I have mates who are all doing uni degrees like enginerring, law, archirtecture. And here i am.. doing something that i don't even like to admit to. its all feeling a little lonely to be honest.
dont get me wrong. nursing is great. male nurses are great. if your considering it, you should totally do it. i just think its me, id probably be like this if i stuck with engineering when i finished high school.
i think im just torn between feeling inadequte cos of my job and not having a real good support network other than the misses. hmmmm...
Frankly, it strikes me that unwelcome and unwanted information on your co-workers menses may well verge on sexual harassment.
This is true--even if the information comes as a result of overhearing a conversation between two others. However, I think the key term is "unwelcome." In my case, I may not particularly want to know, but in truth, I don't particularly mind. In fact, most of the "shocking" things we hear about each other are matters we routinely and appropriately convey about patients during report. I've actually reported that a pt had a very small member, because it was relevant to problems using a urinal.
It's true that I have a pretty good rapport with my co-workers. At least 95% of our conversations are not inappropriate. Most of the conversations that are inappropriate are flirtatious, and I'm as guilty as anyone.
There are times, it seems, when male nurses are "invisible." Female colleagues forget that a male is present--but I think that's still an important distinction from speech that's intended to make one feel uncomfortable or excluded. Other times, one may be treated like "one of the girls," which some might find emasculating, but the intended (consciously or unconsciously) subtext is probably more like "I'm comfortable with you--I feel I can confide things to you that I wouldn't to most men."
Legally, of course, sexual harassment and/or a hostile work environment is more about the effect on the recipient than the intent of the "harasser." It is possible to harass someone without meaning to. I still choose, however, to distinguish between remarks that are "technically" inappropriate and those that are intended maliciously. If I'm sticking my fingers in my ears and saying, "TMI! TMI!" I'm probably laughing about it, and I don't really feel harassed.
Getting back to the topic of "A lonely journey," I think we often have a choice in how we relate to our female peers. We can feel awkward and excluded--and no doubt there are those in the world who would have us feel that way--or we can accept our differences and get past them or even revel in them. I choose to believe that when a co-worker tells me about her ovaries, it's her way of saying, "Yes, I do want to hear about your prostate exam."
a lonely journey, nawh.. not when you are surrounded by hot looking chicks and work for a hospital that has a liberal dress code.. to bad that hospital is only a part-time gig...
You may be feeling some of the culture difference between Ausies and Yanks as well. I can't be sure- but maybe. What I can tell you from my standpoint is that about 10 years ago I felt the same way- Until all my engineering and computer science buddies started getting let go from work. From then on I have never felt lonely or bad about talking about what I do. Hey it's what I do, and all work is noble. Cheers.
nursemike, ASN, RN
1 Article; 2,362 Posts
This is true--even if the information comes as a result of overhearing a conversation between two others. However, I think the key term is "unwelcome." In my case, I may not particularly want to know, but in truth, I don't particularly mind. In fact, most of the "shocking" things we hear about each other are matters we routinely and appropriately convey about patients during report. I've actually reported that a pt had a very small member, because it was relevant to problems using a urinal.
It's true that I have a pretty good rapport with my co-workers. At least 95% of our conversations are not inappropriate. Most of the conversations that are inappropriate are flirtatious, and I'm as guilty as anyone.
There are times, it seems, when male nurses are "invisible." Female colleagues forget that a male is present--but I think that's still an important distinction from speech that's intended to make one feel uncomfortable or excluded. Other times, one may be treated like "one of the girls," which some might find emasculating, but the intended (consciously or unconsciously) subtext is probably more like "I'm comfortable with you--I feel I can confide things to you that I wouldn't to most men."
Legally, of course, sexual harassment and/or a hostile work environment is more about the effect on the recipient than the intent of the "harasser." It is possible to harass someone without meaning to. I still choose, however, to distinguish between remarks that are "technically" inappropriate and those that are intended maliciously. If I'm sticking my fingers in my ears and saying, "TMI! TMI!" I'm probably laughing about it, and I don't really feel harassed.
Getting back to the topic of "A lonely journey," I think we often have a choice in how we relate to our female peers. We can feel awkward and excluded--and no doubt there are those in the world who would have us feel that way--or we can accept our differences and get past them or even revel in them. I choose to believe that when a co-worker tells me about her ovaries, it's her way of saying, "Yes, I do want to hear about your prostate exam."