Failure

  1. Hi all,newbie here.
    I think I am going to try to get into nursing school. I graduated high school a year early and had no clue what I wanted to do. I went to a university and was undeclared. So this year I left my school since they did not have a nursing major and also it just wasnt a match like I thought. My interest in nursing came to me 2 years ago, when I volunteered at a hospital during high school and over time I began admiring and befriending the nurses there and after reflecting on my time there, I think I may have found what I want to do.
    My parents are devastated that I left the university and began taking pre-reqs at the cc in my city.I want to transfer to a university and get my BSN. My parents are calling me a failure because I am not going the route they wanted which is a lawyer (they are immigrants and value education a lot, I do too.)I tried explaining why you have to be a hard worker to be a nurse.
    I am fearful that I wont get into a school when I apply since I lurk here and see stories of qualified people being passed over and having to wait to apply again. I am going to work hard but it seems no matter what I do bad things continue to happen to me. I feel like I am stuck! Has anyone here experienced that feeling?
    Last edit by inquisitivenurse on Sep 19, '06
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  2. 8 Comments

  3. by   maryshome8
    Both of my parents were from Europe, so I understand that there are cultural misconceptions about certain professions here in the states.

    This is what you tell your parents:

    Almost 90% of all those that have a law degree and have passed the bar in their own state are NOT practicing law. Getting a law practice or even getting hired and getting clients, is not the 6-figure job right out of college that so many young lawyers think it is, and parents like yours think it may be. There are many, many broke lawyers, and I have met plenty of them. You have to get out and market yourself, and it can take years to build a practice. I'm not saying no one does it, but it's rarer than people think it is.

    Alot of law practice is considered a "luxury" practice. Alot of them don't get paid by their clients, you can sue, but you can't sweeze blood out of a turnip. When the economy takes a turn, many of these attorney's take a financial hit.

    They have to pay into Errors and Ommissions insurance which can be very expensive, they have alot of expenses such as paying for paralegals, secretaries, etc. Even if you work for someone else's practice, you are expected to contribute significantly to these costs, and you can be operating at a loss before you turn a profit.

    Law school, an AVERAGE one, is about $20,000 per year. Tons of young lawyers are graduating and have trouble paying the loans back because they have $80K in debt when they graduate. Few get scholarships. You can no longer bankrupt student loans if you get in trouble, with the recent changes in the bankruptcy laws. You can thank Doctors and Lawyers for that change.

    Now, with that said, lets look at nursing. One of the reasons your parents may be 'down' on nursing is that the "prestige" of the profession may not have been high with nurses in the country where they are from. It was like that for a long time here in the USA...RN's were treated as labor, they did everything from giving baths to washing out syringes (yes, they used to use glass ones and re-sterilize them), and any other type of cleaning projects. Orderly's are what they had for a long time, which was men that were used to physically restrain patients or to help in moving a body, but they were janitors more than anything else.

    Tell them if you get a BSN and then go to graduate school you will get the SAME level of education as an attorney, and if you get your certification to either be a Nurse Anethetist or a Nurse Practitioner, you will be making MORE than most attornies.

    Tell them you are taking your pre-req's in order to save money. That's the truth. They have to get over their misconceptions that community colleges are substandard institutions just like an apple isn't a substandard fruit to an orange. They are just different and designed to do two different things.

    The Nursing profession has worked for many years in this country to increase it's level of prestige and they have succeeded by leaps and bounds. Nursing used to be what single women did when they didn't get married and didn't want to teach, now you have people from all walks of life getting into nursing.

    Take care, I really hope it works out for you.


    Quote from inquisitivenurse
    Hi all,newbie here.
    I think I am going to try to get into nursing school. I graduated high school a year early and had no clue what I wanted to do. I went to a university and was undeclared. So this year I left my school since they did not have a nursing major and also it just wasnt a match like I thought. My interest in nursing came to me 2 years ago, when I volunteered at a hospital during high school and over time I began admiring and befriending the nurses there and after reflecting on my time there, I think I may have found what I want to do.
    My parents are devastated that I left the university and began taking pre-reqs at the cc in my city.I want to transfer to a university and get my BSN. My parents are calling me a failure because I am not going the route they wanted which is a lawyer (they are immigrants and value education a lot, I do too.)I tried explaining why you have to be a hard worker to be a nurse.
    I am fearful that I wont get into a school when I apply since I lurk here and see stories of qualified people being passed over and having to wait to apply again. I am going to work hard but it seems no matter what I do bad things continue to happen to me. I feel like I am stuck! Has anyone here experienced that feeling?
    Last edit by maryshome8 on Sep 19, '06
  4. by   RN1263
    Quote from maryshome8
    Now, with that said, lets look at nursing. One of the reasons your parents may be 'down' on nursing is that the "prestige" of the profession may not have been high with nurses in the country where they are from. It was like that for a long time here in the USA...RN's were treated as labor, they did everything from giving baths to washing out syringes (yes, they used to use glass ones and re-sterilize them), and any other type of cleaning projects. Orderly's are what they had for a long time, which was men that were used to physically restrain patients or to help in moving a body, but they were janitors more than anything else.
    ...i'm one semester away from my ADN and i will tell you there is no "prestige" in being an RN. that is a "misconception" and yes you will still do bed baths, wipe poopy butts, measure urine, ect.......it's NOT a glamorous job! some students including myself have had to go through a bit of "reality shock"!!!!
    i use to think that only the aids had to do these tasks.....not true. i'm not saying it isn't a good profesion or good money, but it is anything but prestigous....
  5. by   MB37
    I am now 27 and finally finishing up my prereqs for nursing school, but I came from very similar circumstances. I was valedictorian of my high school class and "great" things were expected of me. I got a full ride to a top 50 university and started with enough credits to be a sophomore. I graduated in 4 years, with honors. I majored in history and psychology, and minored in business. I have always been very good at going to school, as you probably are too. The problem was, I didn't know what I wanted to be when I grew up. I planned to go to law school and make a bunch of money someday. I even did well on my LSATs. I decided to "take a year off and bartend" before going back. One year became several, of course, and I met a lot of people in that time. Some were lawyers, others were nurses or nursing students. Needless to say, my parents weren't too pleased with bartending as a career choice. I'm still not sure how they feel about nursing, but I'm sure they would have preferred med school (or law, of working on my doctorate...). Nursing might not be a glamorous job, but let your folks know that there will always be job for you. Any city, any state, rural areas, etc. You can work in different specialties within a hospital, at a doctor's office, home health care, travel nursing, etc. You can go to grad school. You can teach. You can work for an insurance or pharmaceutical company....you could even go to law school someday, having already finished a bachelor's degree in nursing, and maybe specialize in medical malpractice law. Sorry this is so long, it just struch kind of close to home. Don't let them get you down, go for what you actually want to do instead of wasting so many years like I did. Good luck!
  6. by   inquisitivenurse
    Thanks to everyone for the advice. I'm glad I did not waste any more time trying to become something I'm not. I'm 18 now and so technically I am still on time in a "traditional sense" I never dropped out and my parents understand that I am getting my pre-reqs/general ed courses done like any other student. I'm not looking for prestige but I do think nurses are respected and always needed because they do things most wont do. I showed my parents some postions on a job search engine and they weren't completely swayed but they did admit that the pay for BSN and graduate level nurses was good.
  7. by   JoeyDog
    One more thing to think about is that you are going to be the one who has to go to work every day, not your parents. Choose something that you want to do. As a nurse you will always have a job, not b/c you will do things most others wont but b/c people will always be getting hurt, doing dumb things, overdosing on whatever, getting sick, ect. Without nurseshospitals wouldn't be able to run. Good luck!!!
  8. by   sweetbeet
    Remember, you are the one who has to get up everyday and go to work. So, would I rather have dissappointed parents and enjoy going to work everyday or happy parents and feel miserable everyday??? Hmmmm... I'll take enjoy going to work.

    Don't want to sound condescending, but from your post I gather you are on the young side. I'm making a career change at 36 years old, after 17 years as a legal assistant. While my parents were pleased with my initial choice of careers, they support my change midstream - as does my husband. Even if they didn't I would still pursue it. You can't please everyone all of the time. But when it comes to employment, finding something you are happy about doing (and good at) makes all of the difference in the world.

    Good luck !
  9. by   stobbe
    Hi,

    I agree with most of you up there - I graduated 2 years ago with a BS in Interior Design and want to become a nurse! I originally began college as a nursing major, but somehow changed because of my interest in 'Art' and 'Crafty things'. I like to draw, paint, change everyone's furniture around in their house....etc. But I soon learned that just because I enjoy using my creative side, does not necessarily mean my life is going to be fulfilled by doing it as a career. Hence my decision to become a nurse!

    That is what makes nursing such a great career, because people from all walks of life seem to just get sucked into it. It has always had this certain effect on me and I am just really interested in learning all I can.

    Problem is, I am now about to begin my prereq's and am not sure which school(s) to apply to. I live closest to Kennesaw State and met with an advisor there. Very competitive!! Last year they had 800-1,000 applicants to fill only like 60 spots!! YIKES! Um, yeah...So, I am also interested in Emory's program, but their tuition is like 5 times more than Kennesaw, BUT..I do like Emory's timeline better that KSU's. Anyone out there in the same shoes - or from the Atlanta area that has any pointers?

    Should I plan to have like 100 grand in loans after graduating Nursing school?
  10. by   LMRN10
    Quote from inquisitivenurse
    Hi all,newbie here.
    I think I am going to try to get into nursing school. I graduated high school a year early and had no clue what I wanted to do. I went to a university and was undeclared. So this year I left my school since they did not have a nursing major and also it just wasnt a match like I thought. My interest in nursing came to me 2 years ago, when I volunteered at a hospital during high school and over time I began admiring and befriending the nurses there and after reflecting on my time there, I think I may have found what I want to do.
    My parents are devastated that I left the university and began taking pre-reqs at the cc in my city.I want to transfer to a university and get my BSN. My parents are calling me a failure because I am not going the route they wanted which is a lawyer (they are immigrants and value education a lot, I do too.)I tried explaining why you have to be a hard worker to be a nurse.
    I am fearful that I wont get into a school when I apply since I lurk here and see stories of qualified people being passed over and having to wait to apply again. I am going to work hard but it seems no matter what I do bad things continue to happen to me. I feel like I am stuck! Has anyone here experienced that feeling?
    I have to say that more than likely the reason you are feeling this way is because others are putting it into your head. Have faith in yourself. You graduated from High School early!! And don't let the fact that your parents are upset because you are not doing what THEY want you to do get in your way. If this is what you want to do, you will do it!! Best of luck to you!! The only thing you can do is your best and try!! You'll do it!!


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