Parents of kids with autism, please read

**canoehead, BSN, RN** · Oct 13, 2006

Re the sticky issue;

Stickies are used so often they are almost meaningless. What about a search instead- if we sticky autism, will we be stickying every disease that a member has? How about a sticky forum so the most popular topics are all in one place?

LydiaNN · Oct 13, 2006

Re the sticky issue;
Stickies are used so often they are almost meaningless. What about a search instead- if we sticky autism, will we be stickying every disease that a member has? How about a sticky forum so the most popular topics are all in one place?

Well, considering that it has been a sticky for a while and I think this is only post #12 or #13, there shouldn't be too many worries about overuse. This certainly wouldn't make it on to any popular topic forum. Now that it is established, I don't think it would be fair to withdraw the sticky.

Noahm · Oct 13, 2006

My little 6 year old boy has aspergers and ? semantic pragmatic language disorder. He is really bright and sweet. He doesn't wander around or go into people's houses but he talks non-stop about Nintendo and Math to the point that anyone around him wants to run for the hills. We just love him to pieces. I am started to get worried about bullying. He came home the other day covered in yoghurt and said that someone grabbed his lunch and threw it at him. :madface:

LydiaNN · Oct 13, 2006

My little 6 year old boy has aspergers and ? semantic pragmatic language disorder. He is really bright and sweet. He doesn't wander around or go into people's houses but he talks non-stop about Nintendo and Math to the point that anyone around him wants to run for the hills. We just love him to pieces. I am started to get worried about bullying. He came home the other day covered in yoghurt and said that someone grabbed his lunch and threw it at him.

I'm so sorry that happened to your son. Here it seems like the little kids are less likely to bully. Fortunately, our school district has kept a pretty good handle on that and my son has never had any major problems, but I do have friends whose kids have struggled with bullies. May I suggest that you be proactive and talk to the school about this sooner rather than later? I know you don't want this situation to escalate.

My son used to talk about Pokemon so much that I wanted to curl into a fetal position and shut the world out! He has gone through a few different stages... Rumble Robots, Harry Potter, Nintendo, video games in general and computers, but far and away the worst was the Pokemon talk! When he was old enough to understand, the pediatrician suggested setting a timer and saying when it went off, ''ok, time to put Rumble Robot talk away for a little bit and talk about _________ (fill in the blank, it could our day, what's for dinner, homework, whatever, but the idea was to give him time to talk freely about his obsession but help him understand that other people had things they wanted to talk about and do, too.)

Jolie, BSN · Oct 13, 2006

[quote name=Noahm I am started to get worried about bullying. He came home the other day covered in yoghurt and said that someone grabbed his lunch and threw it at him. :madface: [/quote]

This absolutely makes my blood boil! What teacher, lunchroom supervisor, or principal would leave a little one in soiled clothes for 1/2 of a school day?

It sounds like your school staff needs a serious talking-to about decent treatment of ANY child, but especially a special-needs child who is likely to be the target of teasing and bullying.

No matter how his clothes became soiled, your son should have been allowed to change. Our school has a closet of donated clothes for just this purpose. If no clean clothing was available, they should have called you to bring some. By leaving him in wet clothes, they may as well have painted a target on his back.

LydiaNN · Oct 13, 2006

This absolutely makes my blood boil! What teacher, lunchroom supervisor, or principal would leave a little one in soiled clothes for 1/2 of a school day?
It sounds like your school staff needs a serious talking-to about decent treatment of ANY child, but especially a special-needs child who is likely to be the target of teasing and bullying.
No matter how his clothes became soiled, your son should have been allowed to change. Our school has a closet of donated clothes for just this purpose. If no clean clothing was available, they should have called you to bring some. By leaving him in wet clothes, they may as well have painted a target on his back.

Plus, he went without any lunch! You have to wonder at what the school was thinking, but then we don't know how schools are over there. I don't know your age, but when I was growing up, the attitude was very much ''kids will be kids'' (although there were also clothes to change into when such things happened.) Maybe this was leftover lunch and the incident happened after school?

Halinja, BSN, RN · Oct 22, 2006

My boy is 20 now. When he was first diagnosed, no one in the school district knew what asperger was. Even when he was in high school, with an IEP, the teachers just couldn't seem to understand that he wasn't being the way he was just to annoy them, or challenge their authority. Sigh.

And his worse incident was a kid rocking him, one of which landed in an extremely sensitive area. The kid was suspended, then had a 'keeper' for a month, an aide that followed him everywhere to make sure he didn't do anything else to anyone. (my son wasn't the only one he tormented)

33-weeker · Oct 25, 2006

two of my three children have a high-functioning form of autism. (pdd-nos, for those in the know) i'm not sure what a 'sticky' is, but i guess i'm game.

as to the story about problems in the neighborhood... my son is more affected than his older sister. if you'll pardon the description - he's a bit more 'rain man-ish' than she, although he does show affection.

last year, we spent about a week and a half tearing out the carpet in our great room and replacing it with tile. we did it in stages and had to move the furniture around each time. my son started running away.

kids like this do not deal well with changes in their routine or environment. he shut down and became almost non-verbal. he would escape and wander off a few blocks. thank goodness i had taught him how to watch for cars! we had to put new locks all around and keep the keys on our person. we couldn't even let him in the back yard. he could open the gate and climb the fence.

a neighborhood cop, who apparently knows nothing about autism (he had to ask me how to spell it for his report), was rude and threatening to me. the neighbors have been somewhat helpful and tolerant (he didn't go in anyone's house), but i see the looks we get. they don't understand entirely either.

this year, when i remodeled the boys' room from floor to ceiling, i began preparing him a couple of months ahead of time. he was anxious the first night when we didn't get done in time to put their new bed together - but he was relieved when i told him he could sleep with us. the next night he was thrilled. his teacher said he was excited and talked to her about his new room quite often for a time after that.

anyhow, it seems people who don't live or work with these kids just don't understand.

33-weeker · Oct 25, 2006

ps.

my kids have all tested high for heavy metals - not because they have been exposed to more than the average kid - but because they have a genetic predisposition to being 'poor detoxifiers'. their bodies can't get rid of the stuff as well.

we did some oral chelation for the two with pdd (mild autism) and saw improvement. with my son, we would see bursts of language after we did a round of treatment. my daughter, who had no functional language (just words) at the age of 3, was mainstreamed by the start of kinder, and is now in 3rd grade doing on-level work with very little special ed support. if you met her on the street, you might not notice there was anything wrong.

my son should have been in kinder this year, but due to behavior issues, he is just now starting the mainstreaming process. he is very hyperactive, which is a difficult combo with autism. he is extremely bright, though. probably the brightest of my three. he taught himself to read at 4 1/2 yrs. of age. he probably reads on about a first grade level now. both of my kids with pdd are hyperlexic.

i'd also like to interject a comment here, if i may. there has been a lot said in the recent past about kids being over-medicated with drugs for adhd, etc. i'm sure such misdiagnosis does occur. as a nurse, i realize there are fads, even within the medical community. but it really :angryfire when people take it so far to assume that every kid on medication has been misdiagnosed & doesn't need it.

my son with autism/adhd and his fraternal twin, who we think has childhood onset bipolar disorder (that's a whole 'nother thread...) both need medication to function - even at home, let alone in school. they are not just active boys who need to run off some energy. they have real problems that need medicating.

when it comes to medicating kids, i'll be the first one to stand in support of not medicating the ones who don't need it, but i'll also be the first one to say, don't judge me on this unless you've lived with my kids and experienced their behavior firsthand. every parent deserves the same respect.

oldshoes · Oct 25, 2006

Oh, look, Rush Limbaugh's doing the same thing:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/15408508/

"Possibly worse than making fun of someone's disability is saying that it's imaginary. That is not to mock someone's body, but to challenge a person's guts, integrity, sanity.

To Rush Limbaugh on Monday, Michael J. Fox looked like a faker. The actor, who suffers from Parkinson's disease, has done a series of political ads supporting candidates who favor stem cell research, including Maryland Democrat Ben Cardin, who is running against Republican Michael Steele for the Senate seat being vacated by Paul Sarbanes."

Okay, it's Parkinson's, not autism, but the attitude behind it is the same- complete ignorance, and a total lack of compassion.

LydiaNN · Oct 25, 2006

Oh, look, Rush Limbaugh's doing the same thing:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/15408508/
"Possibly worse than making fun of someone's disability is saying that it's imaginary. That is not to mock someone's body, but to challenge a person's guts, integrity, sanity.
To Rush Limbaugh on Monday, Michael J. Fox looked like a faker. The actor, who suffers from Parkinson's disease, has done a series of political ads supporting candidates who favor stem cell research, including Maryland Democrat Ben Cardin, who is running against Republican Michael Steele for the Senate seat being vacated by Paul Sarbanes."
Okay, it's Parkinson's, not autism, but the attitude behind it is the same- complete ignorance, and a total lack of compassion.

You got that right. But we're supposed to overlook the aribag's abuse of prescription drugs because he ''has a problem''. Yeah, right!:angryfire What a hypocrite.

Deliasgone · Nov 6, 2006

Hi! I just wanted to introduce myself. I am a proud mother of a 4 yo boy with autism. I can totally relate to all the stares from the neighbors, fellow shoppers, even family. Fortunately, they have tried to learn more (some are more zealous than others) about the disorder.

In response to the first article, the neighbor was over the line with the sign but I do think that may have been some unaddressed issues with the mom concerning limit setting. I know that it is frustrating for the whole family but if your child needs constant supervision then your child needs constant supervision. Yes, it is sometimes inconvenient and yes, it takes away from normalcy but it is safer than your child running in front of cars, stranger danger, and complaints of innapropriate behaviors. I just hope that everything has worked out for the best for that family and that little boy.