Youngest labor patient? - page 7
What is the youngest age patient you have taken care of or has b een on your L&D unit? I was floored the other week when we had a 12 year old in labor. Yes, 12 years old. Merely a baby herself,... Read More
May 9, '04Quote from kaitlynsmommaOh my goodness!!
12 years old??!! You know what makes me sad? (and this may not be RIGHT for me to feel this way...but..) These 10, 11, 12, 13 year old girls are having these nice big healthy babies, and here my husband and i are, both of us 23 been married for 3 years and we were "blessed" with a daughter who has Cerbral palsy along with MANY other complications and diagnoses. I do know that we were given her by God for a reason, but it still gets me angry to think about!! :angryfire
Katie I totally understand how you are feeling. I was 20 when I had my daughter.she was term and was 4 pounds. She has CP, epilepsy, and failure to thrive alond with a few other problems thrown in to make things even more fun. I did everything my OB told me to do and was in denial when the docs told me what was wrong with Beth, 1st sz 12 hours after birth. While my cousin preg at the same time drank did drugs and smoked and had a "normal" baby, talk about not fair.
I can tell you now almost 12 years later that I would do everything over again. She and my son are my 2 greatest joys in life, I love everything about her from the look on her face when her favorite show comes on to the fun she has putting the groceries away after we go shopping.
I hope your daughter gives you as much happiness that mine gives me.
Try not to get too down about these girls you were "BLESSED" with your little girl, Love her well.
PS I sent you a PMLast edit by missyb on May 9, '04
May 10, '04Quote from KyriakaI have to agree with you on this point. Some of these girls feel so unloved by their own families and have no support so they think a baby will be their source of unconditional love. This can happen at any age, though, not just teens.
And some of them just want something to love who will love them back.
May 10, '0412 year old for me too! It was sad, but I have to say she was one of my best patients. That was over a year ago, and I wonder about her a lot.
May 14, '04I too was a teenage mom. I had my son when I was 16 and I have to say that all of my nurses were terrific!!!!! In fact I'm planning on working at that hospital when I'm done with nursing school! They were all very kind and compassionate!
It is very sad when a teenager gets pregnant. Personally it worked out well for me, my son is the best (oh my gosh he's gonna be 13 - dreading those teenage years!!!). However I was always a very mature person. Helped raise my twin neices when I was 13, so I had no problem taking care of my son.
I think one thing that contributes a lot to teenage pregnancy is the instability of the family home. My mom was pretty good, supportive but unhappy (still is), but my dad left when I was 12 and made the statement to my mom, "Do I have to take the kids for visitation?" Needless to say I didn't see/talk to him much. So when I dated my ex-husband (he left after one year, he was 24 and I was 16) I was overwhelmed when he told me he loved me (duh! I actually believed him). That is pretty much the reason why I slept with him, that and he pushed me to do it a bunch! But not having a male loving role-model and then having a man say he loves you confused me a lot so I gave in to what he wanted.
Just thought I'd share some of my thoughts!
May 20, '04Quote from border rnThis is not because of the nurse you had, this is just because as a teenager you are not prepared to be the kind of parent you need to be to nurture your children.Again I would like to say that I do not judge my pts. All of pts be they teen moms, prostitues, drug users or Drs wives get the same treatment from me. I try to teach and coach and hope for the best. I think the sad part is that all of you who were teen Mothers are so defensive about it. Alot of you have over come quite an obstacle since you all seem to be in Nursing school or about to graduate- I say Bravo!! What you need to realize is that you are the exception to the rule. Not everyone is able to over come such adversity as having a baby young. Look at the statisics. Greater % of being in low income family for life, greater chance of failure to thrive, greater incidents of more childhood ailments, greater learning disabilities. This is not because of the nurse you had, this is just because as a teenager you are not prepared to be the kind of parent you need to be to nurture your children.
I do believe you get looks and snide comments but not from as many nurses as you might think. I work with a wonderful and nurturing bunch of nurses and although there is the odd nurse who does not care to take care of teens or drug abusers ect, I as a charge nurse accomodate that for the sake of the pt and so the pt no matter who they are or why they are on our floor, will get the care they so much deserve during this special time in their lives.
Stop walking around with the defensive chip and look what you have achieved despite it.
In reply to this comment, all i have to say is who are to say that just because of your age you are not ready or able to nurture your children. I know adults who don't take care of their children as well as I do. Another thing is, the reason teen moms are usually defensive is because someone always has something negative to say about it. I understand that maybe I am the exception as far as teen moms are concerned. However, you don't know if someone you are caring for is going to be part of that exception unless you know them personally. You can't make that assumption. Also, just to add, I don't think that it is just the nurses these teen mom's come in contact with it is everyone. I had teachers tell me that I should drop there course, in high school, because maybe I just couldn't handle it. All that negativity is the reason we are so defensive.
I just think that people in general need to stop being so judgemental.
Jan 7, '05Youngest I have seen was a 10 yo that gave birth to twins gotten preg by her teacher she had the babies and her parents adopted them I saw her a few years later and she introduced them as her brothers Now what was differnt about this was i was a 13 yo that was in the same hospital having my first child mine wasnt rape or incest it was called having a boyfriend that was 18 and being told that all girls did it and having older sisters that did talk about it and i wanted to be cool like them ( never say you cant get preggie the first time) My parents let me have 3 options 1 i could place him under adoption 2 i could let them adopt him and he woudl be raised as my brother oe 3 i could keep him and raise him myself well i have a 27 yo son and i am 41 now we grew up togther he is now and always will be my best friend What we need is poeple to talk to the kids now days and show them a live birth including the baby coming out i bet you that we would have less teens getting preg ther into there bodies now days after seeing something like that and what it does they might think twice about letting that asprin fall from there knees sorry folks this is 2005 and there still isnt enough education for these teens remember this is the country that wont show a condom comercel on tv cause it promotes teen sex heck i buy my kids all that they want would rather spend money for something there going to do than to have themn preg or with something that will kill them down the road
Jan 7, '05[QUOTE=Where are the parents?![/QUOTE]
I was about to ask the same question. They have about as much business being parents as their kids do. Unbelieveable. :angryfire
Jan 8, '05As I sat here reading all these posts I can't help but think about several of the young ladies I've taken care of.
There was the 11 year old victim of incest who returned at 12, 13, and 15 to have more children. We tried to help her but she and her family were very uncooperative.
The 13 year old who swore she'd never had sex, only fooled around. Well, the doctors final theory was the bf ejaculated in the upper thigh groin area which was nice and moist with vaginal secretions and the little sperm swam right on up and found the jackpot.
The 14 year old cheerleader with the 21 year old bf whose mother cried and kept telling her mama's here. Where the heck was mama 9 months ago.
The 12 year old whose mother was so excited that she was about to be a grandmother for the first time.
The average age of our patients is 16-20 and most of them continue coming in year after year having as many as 6 or more children. I try to care for all of my patients with compassion and understanding no matter how old they are or how many children they have. It is difficult sometimes to look at these young girls and know that I have an 11 year old daughter and a 16 year old son at home. I am a big patient advocater and believe in educating my patients as much as possible. I also carry that over at home. My children may be young parents one day, I've learned not to say what they will and won't do, but they will not be able to honestly look at me or anyone else and say they didn't know what they were doing or that they could get pg that way.
To those of you who have been the young patients and gone on to get your education and worked hard to make a good life for yourself.......Congratulations. You should all be very proud of yourselves. You should also know you are the exception to the rule.
I try not to let my personal opinions or feelings affect the care I give my patients. I do this by reminding myself that there but for the grace of God go I. My goal is to care for these girls, educate them, and give them the opportunity to express their concerns, reassure them and give them the numbers of people and organizations that can help them when they leave the safety of the hospital. I strongly encourage them to continue their education and give them the names and phone numbers of people who can assist them with that as well.
I've learned in my own life that one wrong decision or bad situation doesn't a bad life make, unless you let it. The wrong decisions or bad situations I've gotten myself into have made me the woman, mother, wife, sister,daughter and nurse I am today. Our life is what we make it, and with the help, love and support of a good family and a strong faith in God we can overcome anything.
Jan 8, '05saddest one I saw while in nursing school was a 13 year old who delivered and found out she was HIV +. She didnt tell any of her family members, not even her mother about the dx, so no support
Jan 8, '05A 12 year old who was quite naturally scared to death. This was before epidurals and she screameddddddddd ! She said her mama had told her to get pregnant because they needed the extra welfare money. She said her other 3 sisters each had several children. I'll never forget her. Her child must be at least 30 by now. I was doing my OB clinical at the time.
Several years ago when I was working OB/GYN we had three 14 y/o's who all delivered within a month of each other. They had decided it would be fun to have a baby and were in a race to see who could have theirs first. OMG. My daughter is 24 and I still think she's too young although I'd love to be a Grandmother. Right now I'm settling for Grandpuppies.
Jan 8, '05In defense of the mothers....I don't think it's fair to say "Where were the mothers when their daughters were getting pregnant".
A mother can only do so much (sermons, pamphlets, face to face talks) to prevent it from happening but in the end it's the girls decision.
Unfortunately a mother can't sit on her daughter 24/ 7.
Jan 8, '05First of all I'm not a nurse, only pre- right now, so I won't be contributing professional opinions....that said.
A concern I have is that an 11 year old is even CAPABLE of conceiving! My friends and I didn't start menstruation until high school!! (14/15 yo) This was only 25 yrs ago. We wouldn't have been able to get pregnant at 11/ 12 yo. (there was only one girl that started in 8th grade). But at 11-we all looked like little boys!! I would be interested in the average age of onset of menstruation??? I wonder if this is an effect of our environment, pollution, use of hormones in food, etc. & I know young girls that have been put on BC in middle school to help with acne!! crazy IMHO. I also see girls in 2nd and 3rd grade who are suffering with early pubescence.
It's scary to me that children are not only maturing socially too quickly but also physiologically!
Anyone have any info or experience with this question? Am I making correlations that aren't there?