You Know You're A Nurse If...

Nurses Humor

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You know you're a nurse if...

You've been telling stories in a restaurant and had someone at another table throw up.

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Specializes in Trauma, Teaching.

You adjust the slings on total strangers' arms, while out shopping.

When someone, anyone, tells you that something hurts you ask them to rate their pain on a scale of 1-10!

Specializes in PICU.

You yell at your husband in the middle of the night because you dreamt that he was a kiddo on your shift that just extubated himself! True story-my husband looked at me like he wanted a divorce lol

Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.
When you start to worry if your patient hasn't urinated in a few hours, but you've gone almost the entire shift without making it to the restroom and you are excited that you have broken your own record!

There was a member that called that good time management.....Mela something....:lol2:

Specializes in ICU, Telemetry.

While at a Revolutionary War re-enactment at Williamsburg, you go to the circa 1770 hospital and find yourself reflexively sorting the surgical tools and turning the handles toward you.

At the same re-enactment, one of the people holds up a small slender copper straw with holes at the end to ask if anyone can guess what it is, and you say, "looks like about an 8 French Foley to me." And you're right. *owwww*

You look at the re-enactors portraying a smallpox victim, and you automatically start looking for PPE.

Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.
When you look like Columbo--patting every pocket looking for the vitals list--while muttering "I know I have it here somewhere". (you have to be older to get this one :)

I resemble that remark.....:rotfl:

Specializes in Pediatrics and geriatrics.
I resemble that remark.....:rotfl:

I call my report sheet my "brain". I have been known to be seen running all over the building lookin for my "brain" which is where I put my patients vital signs on!!

When you assess lower extremity edema and possible origin due to color and symmetry in the elderly customers while shopping.

I was told many years ago I knew I was a nurse if I could empty a bedpan while eating a peanut butter sandwich....

Specializes in community small-town med/icu unit.

You know you're a nurse when, at a family gathering, one of the kiddos pukes during supper. you clean it up, wash your hands, and go back to eating like nothing happened.

The more squeamish in the group looked at me like I had 2 head when I asked if they were going to have the rest of thier dessert or not ;)

Specializes in Pediatrics and geriatrics.

You know you're a nurse when in the middle of cleaning up a huge loose code brown, you say out loud " I have to get brownie mix when I get off work!"

You know you're a nurse when you do the happy pee-pee dance when your patient finally voids

You know you're a nurse when you have perfected the art of only going to the bathroom once during your shift and praying that you don't get a UTI.

You know you're a nurse when you consider coffee one of the important food groups!

Specializes in NICU.

You know you're a NICU nurse when you cross-train a PICU nurse and say, "..and we have baby X, who is very old..." "How old?" "About 4 months" and the PICU RN bursts out laughing...

Kudos to you peds and adult nurses. I have no idea what I would do with anything that big.

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