A few weeks ago we were having an even more busy then usual day at the clinic I work for. As I was on one phone, the other three lines were ringing and my doctor (internal med/pediatrician) was standing in my doorway with a patient who needed his ppd for work. I just so happened that I was on the phone on hold with a urologist (the doctor himself). I was hoping I would be able to get this guys ppd done before the urologist came back on the line or one of his staff members did. I was doing the usual patient teaching before I gave the shot the urologist came back on and realized what I was doing. Being the kind man he is he understood and was waiting for me to finish before he started giving me orders. I was intructing the patient on what to watch for and when to come and have it read. The patient, never having had one before, asked where I would be giving this "shot". I quickley replied, "in your foreskin"! Just then I heard the roar of laughter, from the urologist, the patient, and my doctor. I will never live this one down!
Oct 8, '99
I used to work in a busy ER and everyone would rush around alot. So many things going on at once, people everywhere, xray machines, ekg techs, resp therapists, family, doctors, techs, etc... coming down the hall in a hurry I tripped and was falling when I grabbed onto a young ER doctor standing still charting something. One hand landed on his shoulder and my other hand grabbed his, well you know, private parts. Needless to say I never hit the floor and I quickly walked away hoping he didn't notice that I had felt him up.(so to speak). But the next time I came around the corner he quickly backed up against the wall holding a chart in front of him and the rest of the staff was roaring with laughter.
May 7, '00
A couple of weeks ago we had a patient on our surgical floor start to bleed out. We were getting ready to send her to ICU and someone had to call the patients family and tell them. The nurse who made the call whoever couldn't speak Spanish at all and he came running back to the room to ask one of us to go and tell the family in Spanish what was going on. I by no means speak Spanish well, but there was no one there that did at that moment so I thought, OK I'll give it a try. I got on the phone, did a nice job of intorducing myself, and I proceeded to tell the woman that her mother was... very UGLY! I mixed up the word for sick and ugly and told this woman at three in the morning that her mother was very ugly! Luckily she understood my meaning and came right in but I however, didn't realize my mistake until later when the entire family came in and were looking at me and smirking and I replayed the conversation in my head and realized what the heck I had said to get smirks from a family whose mother was so sick! I was so embarrassed!