The Backwoods Medical Terminalogy

  1. Rednecks have the lowest stress rate because they do not take medical terminology seriously. You are going to die anyway, so live life to the fullest.

    Medical Term Redneck Definition
    Artery - The study of paintings
    Bacteria - Back door to cafeteria
    Barium - What doctors do when patients die
    Benign - What you be, after you be eight
    Caesarean Section - A neighborhood in Rome
    Cat scan - Searching for Kitty
    Cauterize - Made eye contact with her
    Colic - A sheep dog
    Coma - A punctuation mark
    Dilate - To live long
    Enema - Not a friend
    Fester - Quicker than someone else
    Fibula - A small lie
    Impotent - Distinguished, well known
    Labor Pain - Getting hurt at work
    Medical Staff - A Doctor's cane
    Morbid - A higher offer
    Nitrates - Rates of Pay for Working at Night,
    Normally more money than Days

    Node - I knew it
    Outpatient - A person who has fainted
    Pelvis - Second cousin to Elvis
    Post Operative - A letter carrier
    Recovery Room - Place to do upholstery
    Rectum - Nearly killed him
    Secretion - Hiding something
    Seizure - Roman Emperor
    Tablet - A small table
    Terminal Illness - Getting sick at the airport
    Tumor - One plus one more
    Urine - Opposite of you're out
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    About GitanoRN, BSN, MSN, RN

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  3. by   nursefrances
    These are funny Thanks, GitanoRN
  4. by   FurBabyMom
    Having worked in Appalachia - fairly accurate on some of the terms