Senior Stuff

]A distraught senior citizenphoned her doctor's office.'Is it true,' she wanted to know,'that the medicationyou prescribed has to be takenfor the rest of my life?''Yes, I'm afraid so,' the doctor told her.There was a moment of silencebefore the senior lady replied,'I 'm wondering, then,just how serious is my conditionbecause this prescription is marked'NO REFILLS'.'***********************An older gentleman wason the operating tableawaiting surgeryand he insisted that his son,a renowned surgeon,perform the operation.As he was about to get the anesthesia,he asked to speak to his son.'Yes, Dad, what is it? ''Don't be nervous, son;do your bestand just remember,if it doesn't go well,if something happens to me,your motheris going to come andlive with you and your wife....'~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Aging:Eventually you will reach a pointwhen you stop lying about your ageand start bragging about it.---------------------------------The older we get,the fewer thingsseem worth waiting in line for.---------------------------------Some peopletry to turn back their odometers.Not me!I want people to know 'why'I look this way.I've traveled a long wayand some of the roads weren't paved.********************When you are dissatisfiedand would like to go back to youth,think of Algebra.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~You know you are getting old wheneverything either dries up or leaks.-------------------------------One of the many thingsno one tells you about agingis that it is such a nice changefrom being young.<><><><><><><><><>Ah, being young is beautiful,but being old is comfortable.<><><><><><><><><>First you forget names,then you forget faces.Then you forget to pull up your zipper.It's worse whenyou forget to pull it down.---------------------------------Long agowhen men cursedand beat the ground with sticks,it was called witchcraft...Today, it's called golf.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Two old guysare pushing their carts around Wal-Martwhen they collide.The first old guy says to the second guy,'Sorry about that. I'm looking for my wife,and I guess I wasn't paying attentionto where I was going.'The second old guy says,'That's OK, it's a coincidence.I'm looking for my wife, too.I can't find her and I'm getting a little desperate.'The first old guy says, 'Well,maybe I can help you find her.What does she look like?'' The second old guy says,'Well, she is 27 yrs old, tall,with red hair,blue eyes,long legs,and is wearing short shorts.What does your wife look like?'To which the first old guy says, 'Doesn't matter,--- let's look for yours.'*********************Lord,Keep Your arm around my shoulder,and, Your hand over my mouth!We may never meet face to face, but we can meet heart to heart via the web