More joys of getting older....

  1. Now that I'm 'older' (but refuse to grow up), here's what I've discovered:
    >
    >1. I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.
    >
    >2. My wild oats have turned into prunes and All Bran.
    >
    >3. I finally got my head together; now my body is falling apart.
    >
    >4. Funny, I don't remember being absent minded...
    >
    >
    >5. All reports are in; life is now officially unfair.
    >
    >6. If all is not lost, where is it?
    >
    >7. It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser.
    >
    >8. Funny, I don't remember being absent minded...
    >
    >9. Some days you're the dog; some days you're the hydrant.
    >
    >10. I wish the buck stopped here; I sure could use a few...
    >
    >11. Kids in the back seat cause accidents.
    >
    >12. Accidents in the back seat cause kids.
    >
    >13. It's hard to make a come back when you haven't been anywhere.
    >
    >14. The only time the world beats a path to your door is when you're in the bathroom.
    >
    >15. If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them on my knees.
    >
    >16. When I'm finally holding all the cards, why does everyone decide to play chess?
    >
    >17. It's not hard to meet expenses... they're everywhere.
    >
    >18. These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter... I go somewhere to get something and then wonder what I'm here after.
    •  
  2. 3 Comments

  3. by   live4today
    Good ones jnette! :chuckle

    These are the ones in your list that I have personally had many laughs about in my own life. Enjoy!

    Now that I'm 'older' (but refuse to grow up), here's what I've discovered:

    >1. I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.

    >3. I finally got my head together; now my body is falling apart.

    >4. Funny, I don't remember being absent minded...

    >5. All reports are in; life is now officially unfair.

    >6. If all is not lost, where is it?

    >7. It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser.

    >9. Some days you're the dog; some days you're the hydrant.

    >10. I wish the buck stopped here; I sure could use a few...

    >14. The only time the world beats a path to your door is when you're in the bathroom.

    >16. When I'm finally holding all the cards, why does everyone decide to play chess?

    >17. It's not hard to meet expenses... they're everywhere.

    >18. These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter... I go somewhere to get something and then wonder what I'm here after.

    :chuckle
  4. by   nowplayingEDRN
    Hehehehehehehe! I see alot of me in these
  5. by   funnygirl_rn
    Good ones jnette!

close