I have a testimony…I don't even know how to say this but I believe God will guide me. Our God is awesome...He is. I need to share this because I believe God wants someone out there to remain stead fast in their faith…this is not all about NCLEX but is about how our God is able is to change your circumstance despite how all around you confirms failure. I have been asking God to build me up in faith and mind you after this experience smh I am in for a loooong with him.
I have been studying for my NCLEX exam for a month now…I baby sit my nephews and my niece so trust me, studying was not successful. Every little chance I get I try to study but I knew If I continue at this rate I was not going to pass the NCLEX. I got up one day and said…lord, at this point I can't depend on my knowledge to pass this exam. Am not studying as I should and am soo not confident in myself at this point but in you I am made perfect. So I am looking up to you to pass this exam because I cannot depend on myself at this point but you…please help me to pass.
After that I started having a different approach towards studying. i studied as I could but I never got worried that not having enough time to study will affect me because my hope had turned to God and not in anything I was doing. Getting close to the exam I was more than confident…My friends called me and they were of cause nervous for me but I kept encouraging them that I will pass because my hope was not in what I was going to do there …but in God. He is too powerful for me to feel scared and that success and a testimony awaits me. (God, I was confident lol ) I ended up encouraging anyone who called and felt nervous for me.
If you know how NCLEX is set up, you can have 75 question and fail or pass…you can have 100…165..265(all) and fail or pass; no number of question could determine if you passed or failed. But of cause everyone wants to get 75 and pass…no one would want to sit through the whole exam (265). So i proclaimed and believed that am going in the name of my God and that, am going to get just 75 question and pass..i am not going to set there for the whole exam. I believed that so strongly to the point that on the day of the exam I kept telling the people I was going to test with that am leaving in an hour. And they kept saying no..but you know the exam is 6 hours right and I was like yeah I know.
So the day of the exam….(God be glorify..i bless your holy name because you have proven yourself to me and am overwhelmed at your greatness)…I get in super confident..did all I had to do…started the exam. Getting into 20 questions, I said lord this is not easy lol almost every answer seem right but I was like oh well am leaving at 75 either ways..got to 76 and was like WHAT lol ( I just checked my result and I passed!! Glory be to God) I mean I had soo much faith that I was going to leave but the thing is, it wasn't about my plan and how it should fall in place, it was Gods plan and He wanted to use this experience to make me understand how faith works. I gathered confidence knowing that I was going to leave at 100 ..i passed that..i shifted my focus on 160…passed that as well. Obviously, I was in for the long ride. This literally crushed me because I heard most people who gets all the questions fail( fiction). I finally got to 265..i couldn't believe it. I looked at the time and realized I had been sitting for 5 hours 30 mins. I was not tired, I did not get up for breaks and I know God strengthened me throughout the whole process. I found so much joy in that fact…but still I became scared.
I knew I ddnt do well, I was not confident in my performance during the whole test. I became scared. I got out from the exam room I ddnt want to talk to anyone because I knew I had failed. I seek comfort from testimonies online..i read anything that said 265 Nclex questions and passed..all this time forgetting my God and what he'd plan to do. (Stop making the map of how Gods plan will come into effect, you tend to get discourage when it doesn't play out as you envisioned) I came home, ddnt feel like talking to anyone. I kept dwelling on the fact that I failed. Got on my bed cried and prayed…but still I felt I failed. I was lying on my bed and reading postings that said passed nclex after 265 questions†and in the midst of that…God spoke to me ( praise be your holy name o God, for you give me strength in my weakness) He said, why are you surprised you did not do well? Why are you so caught up with your performance on the exams?...is your hope dependent on your performance or me? you knew from the beginning you were not going to pass if you depended on your knowledge because you were not studying as much and that's why you called me. you instilled your hope in me instead of your own knowledge. I am still here, I am God. I call into existence that which is not. Do not lose hope because your hope was never in your performance but in me.â€
I was speechless, His word was soo clear..he had sent me a word that saved me. My mood and everything changed. I became soo happy because my hope was restored; I finally understood faith. You should never allow fear to creep in your heart when your hope is God. After that word I knew I had pass. Because my performance or anything I did was not going to affect my results….God was in control and that was the only guarantee I needed. I got up the following day with so much Joy in my heart. It was not even about Nclex anymore but the fact that I can excel in all things if I focus on my God and not my limitation. I remembered Peter when he was walking on the water to Jesus. He was fine until he saw the waves and started doubting. My performance and feelings after the exam was my wave; and I was drowning because I started doubting but God being as merciful and compassionate…pulled me out by sending me a word. I did not need to see my results before I starting this testimony. I actually started writing this before I saw my results that I passed.
Have faith in God as you step in the exam room. It has nothing to do with how ready you are if you believe in God. I am not going to tell you do Kaplan etc no, it doesn't matter when your hope is in God. Read whatever material you can afford to buy and leave the rest to God. I did Hurts, Kaplan and NCSBN questions but while in the exam room, I could not take anything I learned from them into practice. If you have taken the exam stop wasting your time panicking and reading things online. Get on your knees and assure our God that your hope and confidence is in Him and that you refuse to dwell on your performance but Him. This is not a joke OUR GOD IS ALIVE AND HE HAS DOMINION OVER EVERYTHING ON THIS EARTH! Acknowledge that and trust in Him. For he has brought you this far to finish what He started.
God bless you for taking time to read this, I know God wanted you to hear this and I know without a doubt He is about to give you a testimony..stay bless :)
