Having a hard time with work and TPAPN...Help!!!

[OSoStressed]

Hi I am a grateful recovering addict sober for 8 months. I have been in tpapn since October 2007 for diversion of narcotics and dont have any real issues with them surprisedly. My problem is this...I was able to get a job in November 07 at a surgical hospital which ended in termination not because of my nursing skills or anything with narcotics but because they didnt want to deal with the whole TPAPN thing and found a way to get rid of me. This happened in March 08 and after a month long search I was able to find a great job which I love at a Nursing home as an MDS coordinator. I was informed by my new employer that the company was being bought out by another. They told me that TPAPN would not be a problem with new company and the take over but I have come to find out differently. I had worked under the old management for a month and the take over happened on MAY 1. Every employee had to submit to a drug test that day which I passed fine. I was told just prior to the takeover that the new company does not hire TPAPN Period but they could not fire me since I already worked there. Since then I have found out about secret meetings with my advocate and been asked again about my circumstances of my addiction. I keep getting poked with this daily and I am about to have a nervous breakdown. I cannot afford to lose my sanity over this however I cannot afford to be out of work any more. I was out of work for 3 months initially and then worked for 3 months and then off for 1 again until getting this job. I have applied to every hospital with 75 miles and met alot of silence. The jobs I have found are either not appropriate with my restrictions or I just get over looked because of my problem. I have not been fired but I feel as though its coming for whatever reason since this company is so afraid of TPAPN. I have a clear license and I was not charged with a crime. My job at this nursing home doesnt require me to even think about drugs. I have worked so hard and come so far but I keep getting beat to death with my problem. I feel as though I am trying for nothing because just when I start to feel comfortable or actually enjoy what Im doing something happens. Why bother. Any advice or similar experiences?

[Bethany69]

I have been in TPAPN for a year and a half, and still am not employed. I have tried dialysis, and I even had my dad pay for me to do the Wound Care Certification, because they do not have to give narcotics either. I have finished all the wound care modules and have to send in the application, fee and reference letters...which I need more info on. I also got accepted into the UT Arlington RN to BSN program and started in May. I was relieved to know that school might be considered a form of work for TPAPN, because I am supposed to be through with the program in February, but they said they will not let me out until I have completed a year of work. Good luck with that is all I can say. I thought,well if I do not get a job by my two year date in February, then why could they not lift the narcotic restriction? I have been clean and sober the whole time I have been in the program, and have passed every test, they could at least do that. Narcotics were never a drug of choice for me, they scare me, because I have seen people withdraw off of them, and it's not pretty. I was just a pot head. I believe that should be taken into consideration, but it's not. They do not care, and they do not tell you anything. You have to figure everything out for yourself. They say that that is "part of the recovery process." Ok then, what do I do now?

[TXRN2]

Bethany- as far as i know- they will not lift the narc restriction. the program is one size fits all. so what you have to do is find a job- any job- doesn't have to be something you will love & want to keep forever, but you have to go to work to get out of the program. dialysis works because they don't give narcs- so that restriction is not a problem. i know the job market right now is rough- apply for anything & everything. good luck- keep plugging along- this won't last forever- but you do have to play by their rules to get through the program. their thinking is- you got yourself into the program, so you have to play by their rules to get out. they cannot alter the program for each individual. take care- God bless!