How to deal with negative nurses.

Nurses Relations

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I am a student nurse and will graduate soon. I have worked both in clinical and as a CNA with so many negative nurses. It is difficult to take report when all they have to say are hurtful things about the patient. How can I, as a new graduate, combat this behavior without sounding like a know-it-all and offending the nurses with more experience?

Specializes in ICU.

Just ignore them; you can't fix them. There are a lot of them at my job. I sometimes wonder if nursing is the only job some of these negative nurses have ever had. I worked various customer service for more than 7 years while I was a teenager and in college, and nothing taught me to be patient with even the most obnoxious patients and family members more than working outside of the hospital before I was a nurse. Do I get frustrated and angry? Of course, at least once a shift. Do I let anyone see it? Of course not, in my opinion it is unprofessional and I don't understand why it is so acceptable in nursing to be so negative all of the time. I have been screamed at for more than 45 minutes and told I should kill myself because I'm so incompetent because I couldn't sell someone a pack of Twizzlers because we were all out, and if I had shown half the attitude to that customer that I see nurses show to their patients all the time where I work I would have lost my job. Somehow, taking an attitude with patients is tolerated even though nurses are relatively well paid professionals, whereas taking an attitude with a customer when the base requirement for your job is having a pulse and your compensation is minimum wage will land you in hot water. Why are minimum wage workers held to a higher standard of professionalism than highly educated nurses? That's something I do find interesting. For the record, I don't care if someone has a bad attitude in report, but I often see nurses take their attitudes out on the patients at my job. It is obnoxious to watch. We do have poor working conditions, are frequently understaffed, and often have no CNAs, but seriously - that is not the patient's fault.

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Vacation is so very important to have as a nurse, and trying to leave work at work. I struggle with this sometimes and then I get more stressed out that my work feelings are encroaching on my personal life and happiness with my family.

Would love to hear other comments about this.

Amen to this. As a new working nurse, this is what I try to do.

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Just ignore them; you can't fix them. There are a lot of them at my job. I sometimes wonder if nursing is the only job some of these negative nurses have ever had. I worked various customer service for more than 7 years while I was a teenager and in college, and nothing taught me to be patient with even the most obnoxious patients and family members more than working outside of the hospital before I was a nurse. Do I get frustrated and angry? Of course, at least once a shift. Do I let anyone see it? Of course not, in my opinion it is unprofessional and I don't understand why it is so acceptable in nursing to be so negative all of the time. I have been screamed at for more than 45 minutes and told I should kill myself because I'm so incompetent because I couldn't sell someone a pack of Twizzlers because we were all out, and if I had shown half the attitude to that customer that I see nurses show to their patients all the time where I work I would have lost my job. Somehow, taking an attitude with patients is tolerated even though nurses are relatively well paid professionals, whereas taking an attitude with a customer when the base requirement for your job is having a pulse and your compensation is minimum wage will land you in hot water. Why are minimum wage workers held to a higher standard of professionalism than highly educated nurses? That's something I do find interesting. For the record, I don't care if someone has a bad attitude in report, but I often see nurses take their attitudes out on the patients at my job. It is obnoxious to watch. We do have poor working conditions, are frequently understaffed, and often have no CNAs, but seriously - that is not the patient's fault.

Some of the nurses that I work with it IS the only job they have ever had - They started nursing school when they were 18 and became nurses at 22, and haven't experienced anything else. I am older and have been in the work force along time. A lot of this stuff isn't unique to nursing.

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I hear you Mae2014!

Sounds like the rest of you leaving negative comments in 'attempts to help' need some clinical supervision and self-reflective practice in order to challenge yourselves and find better ways of coping, negativity does not help anyone. It is part of self responsibility and creating that environment in the workplace essentially deflates your co-workers.

Some great comments from people who have dealt with this also though and found a way to cope.

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Thank you for your input this helps a lot when coming across negative coworkers, which is every shift, and negative and very vocal CNA's. I often think to myself that I wish they wouldn't be so negative, but they are and I can not control this. I feel myself drawing back and feeling resentful. I guess to give understanding is a healthy way of acting instead of reacting. This an be difficult to do because its not a social event where this is all we are dealing with, we have so much more to think about. It is a challenge but worth it to give understanding if it means keeping my own peace of mind. Again thank you.

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Wanted to answer to a particular poster a few pages back

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Hi Mae2014,

Welcome to nursing2MzmrmldDUluFszY4BeNRUhFw8YnK8nLzkBNSYABAA== As one of my fav nursing instructors would say! Anon456 is spot on. When I worked in the hospital is not uncommon to get report from nurses who would say some very judgmental, mean things about the pt. and the pt's family. And you are very wise to ask how to address this without seeming like you are the better nurse by not feeling the same or commiserating with your fellow nurse.

So how I personally handled report from a nurse who was obviously burned out and saying very negative things about the pt., family, shift, etc.(because we all feel that way at times...believe me ALL nurses will feel in some way like that at times) is to validate your coworker's feelings 1st. For example:

In report Betsy, RN stated that pt.xyz has been a pain all shift and his family is getting on my nerves...I would come back with something like.."yeah it seems that way at times" but then I would also add "well I know it's tough for staff and pt's and family when they are in the hospital".

Something to that effect. I don't want to pile on about the pt but I also don't want to come across as "aww that's not right to say that" nurse. I can understand what the nurse is feeling and also a pt that is labeled difficult usually just feels out of control in the hospital setting and is lashing out some way.

A little understand all around goes a long way in nursing2MzmrmldDUluFszY4BeNRUhFw8YnK8nLzkBNSYABAA== Good luck to you!

Mj

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