I am a second year RN (i.e. this is my second year out of uni) who has just started in ICU in Feb. I've just finished a night shift. I had the only tubed patient in our little six-bed unit. All was going well, I had everything done and decided to draw up extra syringes for the infusions of levophed and Actrapid insulin.
I had finished checking my patient at 0600 - did the obs, checked her soft restraints were in place and were not too tight and checked that she was comfortable. I stepped out of her cubicle and asked the charge nurse to check my drugs. He was sitting at the station, not six feet from where I stood. I went over to him and he signed my drugs; as he was doing that, the ICU tech said "Oh, she's got her tube out". Sure enough, she'd self-extubated. It turned out OK, no need to reintubate; she is doing well on non-invasive ventilation (BiPAP).
The point is, I feel like this is my fault. I shouldn't have turned my back on her, no matter how well she was restrained or how good she was at 0600.
Add that to the recent mistake I made, when I gave 15mg diazepam IV instead of PO due to a miscommunication about the order, and the additional knowledge deficit I had that almost made me miss someone going in to APO, and I feel like an idiot.
I really like ICU nursing, it's my 'thing'. I don't know if I should be doing it, though; the mistakes I am making are such boneheaded things and could easily KILL someone. I am trying so hard to learn everything I can - I know I will never know everything, but I just want to avoid making these dumb errors. I try to remind myself that I am new to ICU nursing and that no one has died yet due to my idiocy, but I really struggle with the potential consequences of my actions (or inaction). I know experience will help, but I wish I didn't have to do these stupid things while getting experience!
Does it get better? Do you think this is normal for a new ICU RN (both the mistakes and the fear)?
