OK we get it STUD, you're straight - page 8
Something has been bothering me for quite some time on this forum and I have not known exactly what it was. Well I figured it out and y'all may not like it. So often when reading posts on the... Read More
Aug 1, '11Well I am a 'straight' male, and I have no issues working with or being around other gay men. In fact, I helped convince my ex girl friends brother to come out of the 'closet.' That being said, here in the south (NC) people tend to be a bit more apprehensive to gay people than other places of the country, this is most likely because of the geographical area I live in, it's in the bible belt (nothing against any religions), and of course the stereotypical 'image' of what a man should be like. I know I personally have had women ask me if I was gay or not in one way or another, but I am glad that they asked because I would rather them ask than assume. I can empathize with you bro, and it's sad that there are men that feel the need to stand out to others and make it a known fact that they are not gay. If you ask me, that indicates that they have a serious psychological issue with gays or perhaps have had a one time visit down gay ally (lol.)
I will say that there was one case where I was in class (and all my class mates were girls) and we were in the break area, and the girls that were at my table knew a gay guy that was sitting a lone, and they told him to come sit beside them. He would not do it, and I really think that it was because I was there, and he just assumed I was straight, and it would make me uncomfortable or something if he were to come sit near us.Last edit by Thujone on Aug 1, '11
Aug 3, '11What a dumb original post and series of comments. Except for this guy: "Realllly... who gives a toot?" & anyone else who said something similar. So I might as well "contribute" to this inane thread by saying that in my next life I will be single in. 10:1 ratio, but I survived. I don't mean to downplay anyone's experience or opinion, but it really is a non-issue to anyone with any sense - which is to say that evidently it's an issue with most people. It's late, I need more coffee.
Aug 3, '11Frankly, I never thought of this at all when I decided recently to become a nurse. Thinking about it now, I would prefer if no one assumed or wondered if I am gay. But if they do that's their bother. I will be too focused on this new challenge to give a damn!
Aug 3, '11Quote from morecoffeeplsHow very deprecating and patronizing.What a dumb original post and series of comments. Except for this guy: "Realllly... who gives a toot?" & anyone else who said something similar. So I might as well "contribute" to this inane thread by saying that in my next life I will be single in. 10:1 ratio, but I survived. I don't mean to downplay anyone's experience or opinion, but it really is a non-issue to anyone with any sense - which is to say that evidently it's an issue with most people. It's late, I need more coffee.
I found it beneficial to have a cogent stance on the issue when a very upset SO drew a weapon on the unit because she felt her companion was not being treated appropriately, because of her orientation. I found reasoned argument to be highly effective in dispelling heated emotion, before the advent of tasers.
But "many" lack the immediacy of experience to focus their thinking on given issues...
This is a "hot-button" issue for many (on both sides), as is being AA/Hispanic/inthecountryillegally/female/maleina femaledominatedfield/etc.. The issue is not so much the "problem" but the individuals' strong identification with a subculture. In psych, are you not working with individuals attempting to develop integrational models with society, to attain positive developmental resolutions...?
Aug 4, '11Eh ... okay. I did say it was late & that I needed more coffee, though. I meant to address the issue itself & not the people posting about it. Most "hot-button" issues exist because people are irrational and/or self-important, on either side. I'll try to be a "real man" & admit that my tone was imprudent instead of getting defensive.
My real "issue" perhaps is spending time on here reading a series of comments, regardless of the topic, that range from idiotic to pedantic instead of doing homework or banging my head against a wall or something. Right, I shouldn't project.
Aug 9, '11Quote from morecoffeepls...but homework is soooooooo boring.My real "issue" perhaps is spending time on here reading a series of comments, regardless of the topic, that range from idiotic to pedantic instead of doing homework or banging my head against a wall or something. Right, I shouldn't project.
Aug 23, '11The story of an old friend of mine popped into my head tonight. He was a Catholic boy and was sexually molested by a Catholic priest. I don't know how many times, whether it was consensual or partly or not at all, or any other circumstances surrounding that series of events.
What I can tell you is that he has a very confused set of sexual boundaries.
Sometimes he's straight, sometimes he's gay, sometimes he's bi, and I used to have to ask him before we'd go out to the bars on the weekends. I'd have to ask him. Look, are you going to be straight this weekend? I don't want to go for a walk on the wild side, don't care if you do, but I also don't want to hang out with somebody who can't stop themselves from harassing my usual waitress at my favorite coffee shop after the bars.
"She likes it, if you did what I do, you'd know."
No, she didn't like it. I had a hard time going back for a while because of the bizarre behavior of my old friend.
I think some people are homosexual by reasons of genetics that have to do with how the hormonal system deals with stress. Some are conditioned to homosexuality by abuse, some commit homosexual acts but see themselves as straight because they're locked in a same-sex institution for a long period of time, and the bottom line is that it's complicated.
I dunno. I don't have any gay friends right now, but I wouldn't care if somebody I met was gay and I wouldn't judge them on that basis. At the same time, I remember going to lunch with a group of gay men and suddenly realizing that all of them had performed fellatio on one another at some point in the past, and the thought just flipped my stomach and it was time for me to go.
I also remember going on a car trip with three other guys and a girl and realizing that all of us had had sex with her in the past, and she suddenly became very uncomfortable. Thankfully it was a short trip and she didn't have to deal with the stress for long.
Bottom line is if you're gay, I don't care. But if all you want to talk about is gay rights and gay marches and have gay bumper stickers on your VW Beetle or scooter, I've had enough. I also don't want to endlessly dissect football statistics, so if that's the only thing you can talk about then I'm probably not going to wind up at the lunch table with you either.