I have not posted on here for a long time but I need some perspective. I am so stressed at my job that I turn into a different person when I am there and I don't want to deal with people on my days off. This is a short synopsis of my story. I graduated in 2008 and have worked on a neuro/ortho floor since March 2009. I received 3 weeks of on the floor orientation and was then on my own with supportive co workers to help. Even on orientation I was never able to leave on time and it has continued on all of this time. I go in early and get my assignment and start looking up their labs, etc without punching in. Then at 3pm I punch in and start getting report from different nurses on 1st shift. This can take up to an hour after rounding on the patients. 99 percent of the time I have never taken a lunch and sometimes gulp down a sandwich in between tasks or If I am able to sit down and chart during the shift. I have to punch out for lunches I don't actually get to take. I run the whole time I am there and am still running after my shift ends. The running does not bother me so much but when I see other nurses able to sit down and chat and laugh during the shift I get stressed because I don't understand why I am so busy and they are not. I have asked my colleagues how they are able to do this and no one has been able to give me an answer.
I am a good and caring nurse and receive many compliments from family members but the stress of trying to get out on time and be the nurse I want to be is killing me. I am starting to snap at people and am starting to really hate this job. It is not the patients it is all the other stuff that goes along with it. I have tried different ways of approaching my job to see if I am able to get out on time but have not found a way yet. I have probable left on time 10 times in over 3 years. I am at my wits end and feel sick at the thoughts of having to go in today and get on the treadmill again.
Any words of wisdom or encouragement would be truly appreciated. Thanks for reading as I know it is a long post.