I am in first semester Nursing School and need some help.
For background, I am the type of person who needs orders to do a job. I see myself as a tool to be wielded by a hand: a natural born servant. I find most of my work related joy comes when being praised by a superior I respect for helping carry out their will. I have no real ambition for it's own sake and chose nursing based on faulty, outdated information concerning it from family (not that I blame my grandmother and older aunt, of course - medicine changes fast and has changed quite a lot from when they were in school and nurses were just helpers to the MD in charge). That lack of personal ambition is proving to be a crippling hindrance, however. I have made an average of D on my exams. I have come to realize that the NCLEX style questions are designed with natural born problem solver type people in mind - those who spot problems before they even start and are always thinking three steps ahead of illness and complications. I am not among those who think this way; I am a reactor who has never been able to think ahead very well. It is a personality that I respect and serve, easily, but is antithetical to my own personality.
Does anyone else feel this way? Like maybe you made a mistake or didn't really appreciate the full gravity of what Nursing was before you got into the class? Are some people simply not cut out to be real nurses? Should I expect it to magically click? My aunt says it might just click for me if I stick it out but I am worried about me GPA and financial aid situation if I stick it out and totally fail the course. Even with the stress of the program set aside, studying for three to four hours a night to carry a failing grade is demoralizing enough to make me consider dropping nursing to choose another path.
I don't want to sound like I fault my professors either; each is an amazing person who has completely ignited in me a complete respect for the profession of Nursing (more so than was already there). If I am too dumb for this sort of career, it certainly isn't their fault.
Quote from StephenAndrews
I never said I needed to be praised to even do a job, only that I have no personal ambition beyond helping other people and making enough money to do the things I enjoy doing without worrying about living on the street. I enjoy working under supervision and with other people but do not like trail blazing and disagree that one needs to do this to do any career in life. I don't think it is unreasonable to be someone who prefers investments to gambles; when you take responsibility on yourself you are gambling, when you work under someone else you are making an investment without the danger of losing everything (because your leader is taking on that risk) - if anything, I am being prudent.
If you honestly feel like you have to be led to do anything, then I recommend you just drop nursing. Nurses take initiative and we are leaders. A monkey could follow a prescribed order, it's how one executes and continues to treat that prescribed order which what makes a nurse. You will not be praised by a superior for doing your job every day, sorry.
I don't think you're dumb at all, because you did get into nursing school afterall. However, you will find in your career, whatever you decide to do, requires a take-charge approach and someone who's not afraid to research for help or ask for help. You might want to try flipping burgers (harsh, isn't it?).
edit: The reason why you could be failing classes is maybe you're just not motivated in nursing? In our program, all of us are super competitive. We will fight to finish and be the best damned nurses we can be. When we do pathophysiology jeopardy, it's almost like we will murder each other for that one extra point.
That said, I am not all that competitive. I study with a group that makes As and Bs and am always the first there and the last to leave when studying. I have an NCLEX book (a few, ranging from Saunders to others not on the class roster, plus ATI as well) and am trying to memorize all the rationalizations I can read so I can parrot them when needed - it isn't like I'm not trying. I just can't figure out how to problem solve and think ahead like they do. It seems too easy for the others in my study group to pass these tests so this critical thinking and problem solving ability is either inherent or I am an imbecile compared to most the people in my class and got in by a fluke. In which case, maybe I would be better off flipping burgers. Or dead.
Last edit by Vysection on Nov 7, '13
: Reason: Pasting from Word made the font size wacky on these.