I have a problem working with groups (help)

[ARRR10]

^^topic^^. I am in my final semester in nursing school and I have a problem working with groups. Now, I am from a different ethnic background and what is difficult for me when participating in these groups is talking. I also get nervous and I stutter a lot when I am put on the spot. Also, during my time at nursing school, I have develop some of my confidence to communicate to instructors, peers, and patients. However, when it comes to group projects (especially brainstorming ideas) I begin to feel uncomfortable in the situation I am in. Everything just seemed to block out of my head, while everyone in the group is firing ideas. I do not know why this happens, but it just seems as though I get stress and begin to panic and everything just sort of becomes frozen. Everything happens so fast, and when I already think of an idea, another person has already told it. Also, its hard for me to jump right into a discussion, because I have always been taught to be punctual at all meetings and there is that shy part of me that always seems to be holding me back.

I am the type of person that does what is need to be done (for example, if a report needs to be done and I am assigned to do it, I will do it, no questions asked). What is so different about this group project is the amount of work that is involved, because we are doing a community presentation (We just started our first week of nursing school). The group members are really great people and I want to just want to do something, because now I feel I am beginning to be the group member who is in the "out group" and I really do not want to be that person. In the past I have contributed to the group (created posters, fill in my share of the report, and shared the presentation aspect of projects). But now I feel really bad. I don't know, I kinda feel weird for typing this up, but its been on my mind ever since yesterday. I really want to DO something that helps me become part of the group (not only writing the paper, and volunteering to get donations, but just to get into the discussion and talk). I just need some advice.

[Jules A, MSN]

Hi,

Is there anyway you would consider saying something like this or even sending out a brief email to your team? I think it is a very heartfelt and honest evaluation of your strengths and weaknesses and I can't imagine that your team mates wouldn't feel the same and appreciate you for your talents and willingness to work. There is a great value in being the one that can be counted on to produce a polished report. I've been in groups with very charming, bright idea oriented people who couldn't be counted on to do anything more than fire ideas out. The beauty of a team project when it works well is that all different styles are valuable and have a place.

Wishing you well, Jules

[4rom2bRN]

I think you should get your group together and go out for lunch and get to know each other. By doing so, may prevent you from being so nervous. At the same time, you can talk about your project and what actions to take. Get comfortable first.

Much luck to you.

God Bless!

[NurseBettyICU, ADN, BSN]

I felt like I was reading about myself in your post. I tend to be more on the shy side too - and when everyone is looking at me to say something, I get nervous and I trip over my words a lot and that makes me even more self-contious and then I go blank and usually end up saying something stupid.

But once I get more confortable around the group, it defiantly get easier for me. So I agree with the other reply, maybe plan a lunch get-together and get to know them more on a personal level and hopfully that will make you more at ease with them and you will be able to relax more and shoot those ideas off quicker.

Good luck!

[TakeTwoAspirin, MSN, RN, APRN]

If I could count the number of times I would have LOVED you in my group at school...... Someone who you can count on to get their part done and in on time. Most of the time I am begging people to get their stuff together!

Different people have different strengths. You should not diminish your contribution just because you are not a good "brain stormer". You come through for the group in other ways, and your contribution is just as valid and valuable as anyone else. Teams need people like you, just like they need people who can come up with the ideas.

Trust me, when you get out their people will respect you for who you are and love the fact that they can count on you to 'get the job done'.

Try to be a little kinder to yourself and see the good instead of the flaws.

[frugolij]

I could not tell you how many times that has happened to me while working in groups. After reading some of the replies, I now know thats its somewhat common. But at the time, you feel like your the only one that feels like this. I would love to talk to you guys more about all this and what you do to relieve some anxiety. Thanks for listening:yeah: