My Father Died Today

Nurses General Nursing

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Dad took a turn for the worse over the weekend and Mom didn't tell me, although I was becoming concerned because she was weepier than usual. When I got there this afternoon she and my sister had left to go home and my nephew and I spent some time with him. He was not at all responsive. He was on a mask, oxygen as high as it goes on a concentrator, and fighting for every breath. He was a handsome man, 6 feet tall, and was 150 pounds when he died. Apparently they never completely knocked the pneumonia out and he went into septic shock.

We had just finished dinner when the call came. He died at 5:50 pm. He fought hard but lost, although it's a blessing. He is no longer suffering and lonely.

He was a good man, with a sharp intellect, dry wit, and love of knowledge. He was as honest as the day is long, with morals that were clear and unwavering. He is the man who explained to me that it is harder to be an atheist than religious, because we have to do the right thing just because it's right.

My brother and his wif and a daughter are flying in from Ghana on Friday and we will have a small, private viewing Saturday night. No minister. He will be laid to rest as he lived, with dignity and love.

Here is the poem we will read:

A Man's a Man for A' That

By Robert Burns, 1795

Is there for honest poverty

That hings his head, an a' that?

The coward slave, we pass him by -

We dare be poor for a' that!

For a' that, an a' that!

Our toils obscure, an a' that,

The rank is but the guinea's stamp,

The man's the gowd for a' that.

What though on hamely fare we dine,

Wear hodding grey, an a' that?

Gie fools their skills, and knaves their wine -

A man's a man for a' that.

For a' that, an a' that,

Their tinsel show, an a' that,

The honest man, tho e'er sae poor,

Is king o men for a' that.

Ye see yon birkie ca'd 'a lord,'

Wha struts, an stares, an a' that?

Tho hundreds worship at his word,

He's but a cuif for a' that.

For a' that, an a' that,

His ribband, star, an a' that,

The man o independent mind,

He looks an laughs at a' that.

A prince can mak a belted knight,

A marquis, duke, an a' that!

But an honest man's aboon his might -

Guid faith, he mauna fa' that!

For a' that, an a' that,

Their dignities, an a' that,

The pith o sense an pride o worth,

Are higher rank than a' that.

Then let us pray that come it may

(As come it will for a' that),

That Sense and Worth o'er a' the earth,

Shall bear the gree an a' that.

For a' that, an a' that,

It's coming yet for a' that,

That man to man, the world, o'er

Shall brithers be for a' that.

I will miss him. I adored him.

Specializes in NICU, Infection Control.

I, too, remember the night/morning my father died. On my birthday. Nearly 26 yrs ago, and I still miss him. For his own sake, of course, but also for what his grandsons missed in not knowing him and having him in their lives.

My condolences, Sue, I know it's a tough one. xx's

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