I was 17 (3 weeks away from turnin 18) when I started my LPN program, I was also the youngest in my class. Our first day of class consisted of us signing forms, and I had a legit question..."Do my parents need to sign this?"...and everything went downhill from there.
She was my main clinical instructor, she was also my class room instructor for 80% of my nursing classes. During my year of LPN school, on several occasions, she made it know to any and all that she did not believe that ANYONE in their twenties should go into nursing.....and here I was barely 18.
I had always been book smart in high school, and luckily I was able to carry that through into college. I had no problems with the text studies, quizes, and tests. I even passed Nutrition, which I was sure I would fail...(lol...long story).
When it came to clinicals, however, that was an entirely different story. I had little experience with hospitals, or what was to go on inside of them. I was shy, and my nick name could have been "doormat." To this day I do not believe that I did anything so majorly wrong that would cause my instructor to believe I wasn't worth teaching. That is how she made me feel, not worth the time or effort to teach.
I am in no way saying that there were not things I needed to improve on, but who can say that everything they do is perfect.... no one can.
Our semesters were broken into three sections, and at the end of each section you would get a review. Each review I was told a few things that I needed to improve on....and I believed that I worked on them, and that I had improved. Each section of all three of my clinicals, my instructors gave me the indication that I was improving, and that I would be at least a decent nurse, with some minor improvements.
We were scheduled to recieve our pins on a Saturday, and the following Monday, we had our final clinical review. I was allowed to walk across the stage and recieve my pin only to find out that I had not passed clinical III.
During my evaluation, I was told...in no uncertain terms, that my main instructor did not believe I was mature enough to be a nurse, and that maybe I should consider finding another career. She never said direcly that I was too young, but she did tell me that I needed to grow up.
I was crushed, and for the following 3 weeks I cried myself to sleep and seriously debated about never going back. Once the depression abated, I got mad. How dare she tell me what I can or cannot do.
I took the next 9 months taking pre-requisits for my RN program until I could re-enter clinical III. I worked as a CNA, and studied as hard as I could.
The time came for me to take clinical III again, I tried to go through another instuctor, but I was not that lucky. I completed my clinical rotations without any difficulty, and when the time came for me to have my final review....again....I prepared myself for the worst.
She told me that she was suprised to see me back, and suprised on how much I had improved. She told me I had passed, and nothing more, I can still see the look on her face as I walked out the door. She did not seem too happy.
I took and passed my LPN boards, and started in on my RN year. I switched campuses for my RN year, but several of the instructors floated between the two. My main clinical instructor retired that year, and I thought my worries with instructors were over....oh how wrong I was.
One rotation I had was at a local hosital, and I was beyond thrilled, because it was only a 20 min drive from home. Our clinical instructor there, however, was just little bit weird. She would disappear in the middle of clinicals, she rarely gave clear instructions, and several of my classmates had problems with her.
At this time, I am still the youngest in class, and only 19. My parents were having issues with my sister, and on one particular night, I did not get enough sleep before class. I arrived to clinical on time, I had yet to put my hair in a ponytail, and got yelled at for it. We had been passing medications at this hospital for at least 4 days, and our instructions were to assemble your meds, find the instructor, and she would supervise the pass.
I did as she asked, but I had a question in regards to one of the medications, so I did not pull it out. I got yelled at infront of the entire class for it. I retrieted into a corner, and tried to compose myself as she started to help another student. My pills did eventually get passed, but Instructor requested that I stay after, because she had to "talk" to me.
Her talk, it turns out, was her trying to get me to take anti-depressants because I cried at clinicals. (I guess she didn't get that it was HER, not depression that made me cry.) This talk lasted about half an hour and the entire time she is telling me HOW DEPRESSED I AM....I was never depressed....I was STRESSED, and she was only making it worse.
I made it through the rest of her clinicals, and moved onto some AMAZING instructors. I passed my RN boards, and now have been an RN for over 4 years now...completely anti-depressant free....not that I was depressed in the first place....
So that's my dealings with two not so good clinical instructors...