new graduate nurse...worried and scared!

  1. 0
    Hi everyone! I wasn't exactly sure where to post this but I just graduated with my BSN in april! I would love to start off with an internship to help me transition into the position of a full-time RN. In order to apply, I have to pass the NCLEX first, so I have started doing some studying. I have only had one interview with a different hospital as a back-up option for a residency program, but found out a couple of weeks ago that the position had been filled. I am afraid that I will not get a job because I am naturally a shy person and may not come across as confident in interviews, no matter how hard I try. I am also very afraid that I am not cut out for hospital nursing, but I realize that this is the gateway to other options such as clinics, offices, nursing homes, or homecare nursing. I originally started out wanting to be a NICU nurse, but I felt that I had to let go of this dream since I get easily overwhelmed and don't feel that I am fast with thinking on my feet or critical thinking, and I realize that these are necessary. I did my practicum on a mother-baby unit, and I loved it. I feel now that this is the area that I would want to go into, but I still have many doubts. For one thing, I never feel confident in my abilities. Even when someone tells me that I have done well with something, all that I can focus on are the things I have done wrong. I continually beat myself up over mistakes I have made in the past. I have never made a mistake so terrible that I harmed someone, but I feel guilty, even after graduating, over every thing I have done wrong and every patient who I feel somehow ended up receiving worse care because I was assigned to them. I still feel terrible over every medication that I gave late or every error I made in charting. I know that I am not perfect and that we all make mistakes, but I honestly can't help but feel that I will be a bad nurse and that this makes me a bad person because I made these mistakes. Sometimes I wish that I could go back in time and do things over again. I just don't know what to do...I don't want to give up, but I could never forgive myself if I put someone in harm's way. How will I survive a year of med-surg, even if I start out in a med-surg internship? Are there any other options for me that wouldn't require starting out in a hospital? I felt that starting out in the internship would be better for me. Am I too shy, too quiet, and not strong enough or smart enough or a good-enough person to do this? Should I let go of wanting to be a nurse altogether? Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated. And for those of you who are already nurses, the world is a better place for having you in it :heartbeat! Thank you in advance for any advice you can give me!
  2. 14 Comments so far...

  3. 1
    I think you should give it a chance. YOu went to school all this time.
    Everyone is a "new" nurse. Give it time.
    OreoCookie3 likes this.
  4. 2
    "...hospital nursing, but I realize that this is the gateway "

    A gateway that has been pretty well blocked for the past 2-3 years. If whatever you try doesn't work out work out, try something else.

    Nobody starts off being super nurse. Those are not born, they are made.
  5. 1
    I think you should try nursing jobs in clinics or in homecare. New grads are considered for these areas too, you don't have to limit yourself to only hospital positions. Some places hire new graduates for in-office case manager position as well. So explore other areas!
    OreoCookie3 likes this.
  6. 1
    I WOULD suggest long term care, you get used to chaos and having to think on your feet in a very supportive environment. acute care rns tend to eat their young when it comes to one upmanship in clinical skills, on the other hand everybody in long term care usually has a large heart and a lotta love for thier patients, and you have to work together as a team, the cna, charge nurse, and everybody else is up to their asses in alligators trying to keep everyone medicated,progressing in therrapy, or prepareing for death, while maintaining professionalism, safety ,and quality of care. I believe once your are comfortable in this environment you can transition into acute care and be top notch causse you have seen it alll....good luck, you are prolly already a great health care professional....give it time
    OreoCookie3 likes this.
  7. 1
    Quote from wowensue
    I WOULD suggest long term care, you get used to chaos and having to think on your feet in a very supportive environment. acute care rns tend to eat their young when it comes to one upmanship in clinical skills, on the other hand everybody in long term care usually has a large heart and a lotta love for thier patients, and you have to work together as a team, the cna, charge nurse, and everybody else is up to their asses in alligators trying to keep everyone medicated,progressing in therrapy, or prepareing for death, while maintaining professionalism, safety ,and quality of care. I believe once your are comfortable in this environment you can transition into acute care and be top notch causse you have seen it alll....good luck, you are prolly already a great health care professional....give it time
    This seem like a bit of an over generalization of acute care RN's? I would never be hard on a new nurse and I also like the idea of teaching others what I can and learning what I can from them at the same time.
    OreoCookie3 likes this.
  8. 2
    Quote from OreoCookie3
    Hi everyone! I wasn't exactly sure where to post this but I just graduated with my BSN in april! I would love to start off with an internship to help me transition into the position of a full-time RN. In order to apply, I have to pass the NCLEX first, so I have started doing some studying. I have only had one interview with a different hospital as a back-up option for a residency program, but found out a couple of weeks ago that the position had been filled. I am afraid that I will not get a job because I am naturally a shy person and may not come across as confident in interviews, no matter how hard I try. I am also very afraid that I am not cut out for hospital nursing, but I realize that this is the gateway to other options such as clinics, offices, nursing homes, or homecare nursing. I originally started out wanting to be a NICU nurse, but I felt that I had to let go of this dream since I get easily overwhelmed and don't feel that I am fast with thinking on my feet or critical thinking, and I realize that these are necessary. I did my practicum on a mother-baby unit, and I loved it. I feel now that this is the area that I would want to go into, but I still have many doubts. For one thing, I never feel confident in my abilities. Even when someone tells me that I have done well with something, all that I can focus on are the things I have done wrong. I continually beat myself up over mistakes I have made in the past. I have never made a mistake so terrible that I harmed someone, but I feel guilty, even after graduating, over every thing I have done wrong and every patient who I feel somehow ended up receiving worse care because I was assigned to them. I still feel terrible over every medication that I gave late or every error I made in charting. I know that I am not perfect and that we all make mistakes, but I honestly can't help but feel that I will be a bad nurse and that this makes me a bad person because I made these mistakes. Sometimes I wish that I could go back in time and do things over again. I just don't know what to do...I don't want to give up, but I could never forgive myself if I put someone in harm's way. How will I survive a year of med-surg, even if I start out in a med-surg internship? Are there any other options for me that wouldn't require starting out in a hospital? I felt that starting out in the internship would be better for me. Am I too shy, too quiet, and not strong enough or smart enough or a good-enough person to do this? Should I let go of wanting to be a nurse altogether? Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated. And for those of you who are already nurses, the world is a better place for having you in it :heartbeat! Thank you in advance for any advice you can give me!
    I understand being unsure of yourself when you are new. I had the same problem, but what I did was get in there and work. I would assess my patients and bounce my ideas off of more experienced nurses. After a short while, you will realize that you can trust your assessment and that you will gain more confidence with time. You should not give up on your dream of being a NICU nurse. You can do it if you try. You put one foot in front of the other and reach for you dreams, never let them go. Otherwise what is the point of living at all? That is just what I think, good luck
    OreoCookie3 and pinkchris2000 like this.
  9. 0
    Thanks everyone! I appreciate your responses and am starting to feel better. I will keep hoping that I will find the right place for me and will not give up the dreams I have! If I got a job at a clinic, would it be a problem for me to later on get a job at a hospital without hospital experience, or would it depend on the type of hospital nursing that I wanted to do? Thanks again, you guys are wonderful!!
  10. 1
    I agree not to limit yourself. I always thought I would work in the hospital, but I got a job in a doctor's office and love it! I have nights, weekends, and holidays off and it's lower stress than a hospital. It's not where I thought I'd end up, but I'm so happy
    OreoCookie3 likes this.
  11. 1
    If you go for a hospital job, be sure to ask how long the orientation is, what kind of support you will have, etc. Make sure there will be a nurse educator to ask questions of in the beginning. If they tell you you'll only get a 3-week orientation and there's no nurse educator or even supervisor to help you out, think long and hard about that job. At least in my opinion!

    LTC would definitely make you get really good at time management! And I have found LTC nurses in general to be a helpful bunch. Also consider a sub-acute rehab facility. I would avoid the for-profit sub-acutes, because their patient loads tend to be heavier than non-profits.

    I'm not a big fan of home care for someone who isn't confident, not right out of school, at least. While it is true you will have phone access to a supervisor, you really do need to be able to think on your feet, have great assessment skills, trust your judgment, etc. If a home care job entailed working one-on-one with another home care nurse for a decent orientation period, that would be a better situation. But NOT if they are going to quickly send you out on your own. An alternative, if you are interested in home care, is working with just one patient for an 8 or 12-hour shift. Then you can get to know that one patient very well. But remember that someone who needs one-on-one nursing care is going to be pretty sick!

    Try not to be so hard on yourself. Everyone is a newbie at first and everyone is slow and everyone makes errors.

    Good luck. Just concentrate on passing NCLEX right now. With your license in hand, you will look more interesting than a candidate who has not yet passed the test.
    OreoCookie3 likes this.


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