Working with patient families

[Ms. Nurse Assistant, LPN]

Since I've been working in the medical field as a CNA/HMA, I have come across some nice patients.

For some reason, I have not had any good experiences with the extended family members of the patients, particularly the ones who are not always around to know what's going on.

Typically, when a patient tells me that their brother/sister, etc are coming to visit, I think "I bet they are going to be a real piece of work" and typically they are.

I understand the love the patient, and want to make sure you are doing a good job. I get that. But it's the attitude, and the way they go about making sure you are doing your job that really peeves me. I just don't like it. NO matter how they say it, it just always comes across ****** and territorial.

Recently, a patient of mine close relative came to visit, and she claimed that someone threw some soiled briefs into the closet. I did NOT do it. I suspect the other aide who comes did it, a few times I had to clean up a few things behind her because she is messy. Due to my luck, they blamed it on me:argue: To throw some soiled, dirty briefs into someone's clothes closet is absolutely disgusting and I did not want to take responsibility for that, I completely denied it because that is just trifling and disrespectful (I'm doing homecare)

The close relative who is never there, told me it happened on my shift (how would she know, she's not there everyday), and to make sure that everything is cleaned before I leave. So now I have to check inside the closet to make sure no one is hiding dirty briefs in there

He was kinda polite about it, but I suspect that they may not trust me because of this. I just hate this aspect of the medical field, how easily you can get blamed for another person's messy behavior.

[OpusNurse]

I totally understand your frustrations. Absentee families are the worst. They think they know everything. Families in general are usually oblivious to what is actually going on.

I once told the son of a patient that if he had any doubt he was welcome to come spend a day with me and I would show him everything that was being done for his mother and how the whole process in getting her hip replaced worked. Of course he never did and I Never heard from him again for a very long..............time.

On the other hand, I absolutely adore the families that appreciate the care thier family member is recieving and actually participate in thier family members care. They of course are ones that keep me nursing.

Last week my palliative patient that should have died weeks ago kicked her family out of her room. The family (one of the good ones who help out and are there daily) wasn't very happy about that, but my pt was just fed up with them sitting at her bedside waiting for her to die. She probably saved up her day's energy just to say "get out'. She just wanted some peace and quiet so she could watch TV. Kudos to HER!

[fuzzywuzzy, CNA]

I love it when someone who I've never seen before comes up to me and starts asking about their mother. And when I ask who their mother IS, they get this attitude like I should know. Okay guy, there are over 100 beds in this facility and I'm guessing at least 80 of them are occupied by women. Just tell me who she is first.