What's the deal with my nursing program?!?

[Pebbles82]

I'm a month in my third semester of nursing school, yay! There are only 6 of us that are in our 30s, married & with kids the rest of the class are literally fresh outta high school and are so stinking rude it's unbelievable. One instructor I feel as though I have not learned anything from her, the first exam this semester 23 people failed her exam & 19 passed. The instructors think you should already know everything that a veteran ICU nurse should know & preach to us how we are adults and should learn on our own. I totally understand that they should not hold our hands all the way up to graduation day but everyone just comes across like it would just kill them if they were to help someone and belittle you if you just so happen to not know or understand something. I am treated like I am invisible to 99.9% of the class. I just wish I had known someone who had went to this BSN program before I applied, I would not have wasted my time or money. Just 8 more months, hopefully I make it to the end. I have hit my wall of burn out, I've begun having little melt downs & crying on a daily basis here lately. I can not wait till it is over. I keep trying to think positive and see the big picture, I can see a glimmer of the light at the end of the tunnel but I'm so ready to just throw in the towel. Has anyone attended nursing schools similar to one like this & if so, some words of encouragement??

[Everline]

It was about the third semester in my program that they started to expect a lot more out of us. I remember thinking my teachers were so cold, as they didn't seem to care if we passed or failed. People were struggling to pass exams and quite a few did not make it and had to repeat or were kicked out depending on their circumstances. In addition to that very tough theory class, my clinical instructor that semester was so brutal. She reminded us nearly every clinical day that she could fail us. She expected us to perform skills efficiently that we had never done on live people and hadn't practiced in the lab for quite some time. She didn't accept any "excuses" that we had not performed the skill on an actual person yet. She expected that if we were checked off on it in lab, we should be able to get it done in the hospital. We were expected to step it up tremendously and get it done fast. She was huge on time management and she was brutal to us in post-conference. I walked out of clinical almost in tears each time, absolutely dreading coming back there the next day. In other words, I feel your pain.

I really, really hate to say this and I know if someone had said it to me at the time, I would have wanted to punch them in the face but...that brutal semester taught me a lot and made me stronger. I felt like if I survived that I could survive anything, lol. And that was tested the following semester when I had another no-nonsense "I will send you home in a heartbeat" instructor--and a theory instructor who expected us to do a lot of learning on our own.

Some people breeze through nursing school, but I am not one of them. I do very well academically. My grades are excellent but my emotional well-being has been tried to the limit. I am graduating soon, thank goodness. I have to believe that all I have been through will make me a better nurse.

Some things I do to cope:

I keep a journal where I write out everything and anything I am feeling. I've worked out a lot of issues by writing about them. Also, going back in my journal and seeing what I have survived reminds me of how strong I can be and that I can make it!

I do a lot of my own version of "cognitive restructuring". Identifying cognitive distortions helped ease my anxiety. This is different than forcing myself to "stay positive" all of the time (see below).

I don't try to "stay positive" all the time. That causes me more stress. I allow myself to have times of being miserable. I get it out of my system. I complain to my husband, who is a saint to listen to me patiently each and every time. I've even said to him, "I quit! That's it. I'm going in tomorrow to withdraw!" --Then I pick myself up and do the work that needs to be done despite not particularly feeling motivated or wanting to.

Of course, eating well, finding exercise time and time for enjoyment will always help. It's been hard for me to manage those particular things, but I do what I can.

I know it's hard, but hang in there, do the work and it will fly by more quickly than you might imagine.

ETA: Do not be afraid to seek help if you need it. Talk to your doctor or a counsellor if necessary! I probably could have benefitted from doing that myself.