What is going on!?

Posted
by guest430699 guest430699 (Member)

I don't know where to start. Let's juat say I feel completely lost. I am going to graduate with my Associates degree in nursing in 5 weeks. I just took a job as a nurse extern on a busy Med/Surg floor.

"It's what I wanted!! It's such a great opportunity!"----- I thought.

I have literally cried for two days now. I don't understand how I thought nursing was so wonderful, only to get into the "real-world" and learn what everyone has been telling me this entire time. NURSING IS STRESSFUL! (and can you imagine I am only a TECH as of now!)

I was on my second day of orientation when they stuck me with 8 patients all by myself. We must document at 0800, 0900, 1100, 1200, 1300, 1500, 1600, 1700, & 1900 on all patients. I just had a 4 hour course on the computer documentation system the day before that. The tech training me takes care of her patients, BUT she doesn't smile or comfort them. It's just in & out of the patients room. I was trying to document on my patients the way I thought accurate (such as charting "family at bedside") and she was telling me I was wrong to document that way because it was the "nurse's responsibility".

I lost it and hid in the bathroom crying. My boss is wonderful and she is very supportive. She asked me if I wanted this job................. I told her what I was dealing with, and she agreed to go ahead and take me off orientation, and give me MY OWN FIVE PATIENTS so I can document MY WAY. OH Lord help me!!!!!! I don't know if I can do this. Someone tell me if I am being crazy??? I don't mind the truth. I need any help I can get. :crying2:

yousoldtheworld

yousoldtheworld

Has 5 years experience. 1,196 Posts

If you were told to document a certain way, then do what you were taught or you could be disciplined for it...if other aides don't, that's their problem. As your supervisors if you aren't sure what charting is your responsibility and what is the nurse's.

As for having 5 patients...well, you'll probably have a lot more than that once you really get working and graduate, so it's good to get that experience in before you're completely thrown in.

And believe me...it's not as easy to "smile and comfort" patients as you might think, once you actually get working. There's a lot of responsibility and a lot of things to do and sometimes you're too busy having your butt chewed for something stupid to even think about things like that. I'm not saying it's a good thing - obviously you want to be as kind and compassionate toward your patients as possible. Just suggesting that you don't judge until you're in that tech's shoes...

yousoldtheworld

yousoldtheworld

Has 5 years experience. 1,196 Posts

All that said, though...while it IS a super stressful career field...it does get better. Once you get used to the job and feel more comfortable in it, it won't be so overwhelming.

guest430699

guest430699

37 Posts

Thanks so much for your advice. I do feel bad for judging the tech training me because she gets her job done and has time to relax throughout the day. I am still very new to working in a hospital. I guess my main problem is I'm just disappointed. I wanted to work so hard to get my degree so I could have an "easier" life. Nursing is lots of documentation, and it takes away from patient care. I just feel stupid for breaking down. No sleep, no time for lunch, and the reality of it all is just too much for me.

yousoldtheworld

yousoldtheworld

Has 5 years experience. 1,196 Posts

Thanks so much for your advice. I do feel bad for judging the tech training me because she gets her job done and has time to relax throughout the day. I am still very new to working in a hospital. I guess my main problem is I'm just disappointed. I wanted to work so hard to get my degree so I could have an "easier" life. Nursing is lots of documentation, and it takes away from patient care. I just feel stupid for breaking down. No sleep, no time for lunch, and the reality of it all is just too much for me.

Oh, don't get me wrong, I know where you're coming from! None of us really expect what it's really like, whether we're aides, techs, nursing students, or nurses. I remember when I was brand new thinking "oh gosh, I could never be as grouchy or brusque as these aides and nurses" but dang, I learned quick. Yep, the breakdowns happen. It's rough.

But I do encourage you to give it some more time! And if you never get more comfortable in the hospital setting, do try another setting, whether it be LTC, Assisted living, home health, whatever. Everyone's suited for something different. I never was happy at the hospital, but I did finally find my niche, and though lord knows it 's still stressful and I have my days (okay, I'll be honest...I have my moments, most every day, where I want to pull my hair out), but I leave feeling fairly fulfilled and not like I want to crawl in a hole like I used to. You're not alone! :)

guest430699

guest430699

37 Posts

I just realized that there was A LOT of things that I left out of my original post. My day involved much more than just documentation and a monotone tech. Oh well.....I have to go back in in the a.m., and I'm scared to death. Plus I feel like a crazy person for getting so upset and crying in front of everyone. I'll definitely remember what you said, and not give up. Thanks again for the help. I need all I can get!

yousoldtheworld

yousoldtheworld

Has 5 years experience. 1,196 Posts

Don't feel like a crazy person. Know what? I've been an aide for more than 5 years, and I've been at my facility for a year and a half. I love my job and I do a great job at it. But I've cried in front of everyone more than once, and most recently just a couple of weeks ago.

We have one resident who kind of sucks the will to live out of all of us. He has Down's Syndrome, and the mentality of a 3 year old, but on top of that, he is geriatric for a Down's patient and he has dementia. So, imagine a large 3 year old who sundowns like mother-effer every evening. I'm talking 8 hours of screaming, hitting, pounding on the walls, and tantrums. I consider myself and most of my coworkers quite sane, but many of us have broken down just trying to balance dealing with him with trying to take care of our other residents, as well.

There was another time I cried in front of everyone, after 3 weeks of a new hire trying to find ways to get me fired, going as far as blatantly lying and accusing me of physical abuse. Interestingly enough, she decided she hated me and was going to get me fired after I reprimanded her for what could basically be considered verbal abuse - and I didn't even turn her in, as she was brand new, and I simply explained to her that commenting on a resident's physical deformity in front of them could be considered abuse.

So, if you're crazy, than so am I...and I'm sure we're not the only ones. :)