What to do when coworkers exclude you?

[_Skittles_]

I don't know if it's intentional or not but my coworkers go out frequently to brunch, to bars, to football games, and have parties. They invite everyone from the pcnas to the older nurses but I'm always left out.... Lately it's been really bothering me especially since I'm in a newer city so I don't have friends around and I've been here a year - I've tried to be friendly....idk what to do. It hurts and makes me miserable at work too.

[TeddyBer]

Believe me I can understand this. I was the racial minority (Caucasian) at my first job out of nursing school and was excluded from the "club" .....

it hurt because I got along with my coworkers well and I felt left out.

As time went on, I realized it was a blessing. I decided that it is better for me to keep work and personal life separate. I don't even talk about any personal status at work now and I go to work, do my job, I'm friendly and helpful and I leave it at that.

Yes there are a couple of people that are exceptions and we have become and remain friends outside of work, but choose your work friends carefully.

i found ways to make friends outside of work through my hobbies etc.

At times when it gets to me, I remind myself at the end of the day, work is work.

[Maevish, ASN, RN]

I'm sorry. That's no fun and, as a traveler, I go through that every 13 weeks or so. It can take awhile to get "in" with everybody, but if they're that self absorbed and don't notice that you've not been at any brunches, etc over a YEAR (even if they all think someone else asked you to go), then they may not be worth it. Sometimes that happens on assignments and I'm ok with it because they're not very nice people and gossip about people at work who aren't there.

If you do like them, though, and want to find out, insert yourself. Ask if they need help with something AS you're nearly ready to do it or get call lights, etc that aren't yours. I have to do that at every new assignment until they realize they can trust me and let me in that way. I will talk about unrelated work things with them as well, but, since I don't need to know about the daily runnings of the hospital or staff benefits, I stay out of those conversations.

Good luck

xo