Was I bullied or am I too sensitive?

[green_girl]

I have been off orientation on a Med Surg floor for about five months. My original educator transferred right as I was on my own. JC is coming soon to our hospital, and its in on high alert. The new educator tells me on Friday that she has none of my paperwork and I need to get it to her ASAP. This is right as I was receiving morning report and I just said, I'll take care of it".. Figuring the old educator didn't file away my paperwork before she left. Later I can't find the paperwork where they've instructed us to keep it (can't take it home just in case of a JC visit). Monday I ask her to please check her files because there is no where else it could be, she still holds that she has nothing for me. Few hours later, I meet her in her office and ask again.. twice and remind her that I finished orientation before she arrived.. then she gets up to look. Low and behold, I have a file but the 7 pg competency form is missing. She hands me a blank one and tells me I need to have my preceptors fill it out again. I come in the next day (my day off) to catch two of my preceptors and fill this out. Before I have a chance to get started, the Dept. Secretary finds me with the missing competency form to have me sign it. I was so relieved but annoyed that my educator didn't think to send me to her first. She had a 4" stack of paperwork for various employees that needed one thing or another. I'm sure she was aware the Dept Secretary could have had my form.

So I was stressed for 5 days over nothing, and even before this happened I tend to avoid this woman because she likes to point out what I'm doing wrong (Ex:"Don't keep the insulin vial on your computer cart because someone pulled up the whole vial once thinking it was Heparin") She has a reputation for getting on people's nerves. I want to say something to my NM but not used to working in a corporate environment this large and this may be viewed as a minor thing that is not worth it. I have an ANM encouraging me to be on the UPC Council, so I can't be doing that bad. Any input would be appreciated. Thanks..

[llg, PhD, RN]

What you are describing is not bullying. It is a stressed out NEW unit educator who has come into her position right before a JC visit. She is probably in charge of assuring that there won't be problems with the JC visit, but she has not had time to prepare -- and the former educator did not leave with everything done and ready. Yet, she will be held accountable if things go wrong with the JC visit.

She is under more stress than you are -- newer in her job and given more responsibility for things she has had limited control over. Give her a break.

This is definitely NOT bullying.

[Wuzzie]

Bullying? Not even close. For the love of God how on earth did you draw THAT conclusion? And the Insulin/Heparin thing? That's her JOB. Sorry she's annoying people by correcting their mistakes before a patient gets harmed.

Seriously. This is a perfect example of why we are so tired of the term "bully" being thrown around.

[green_girl]

Wuzzie, you are absolutely right.. safety is our #1 goal and since she scared me straight I have not left the med room with an insulin vial. Yes, it was an extreme example and that was perhaps her goal. You and llg have reminded me that I am too sensitive to criticism and need to grow a thicker skin.

Llg, I knew she was stressed about JC, the old educator left abruptly and probably left things undone. She was an educator on a different floor previously though. It was that it took so much convincing for her to make an effort to see if I had a file before scaring the crap put of me. This is a case of the left hand not knowing what the right was doing.. and to be expected in this crazy time. but I get it.. NOT BULLYING. Thank you both for setting me straight.

[Wuzzie]

Based on your response here I think you're doing fine. Nobody likes getting criticized even us oldies. It stings even if we know we did something wrong. As a new person you probably are extra sensitive because not only are you trying to learn new things you are also trying to prove yourself. That being said a thick skin is a very good thing in nursing. Emotions frequently run high, as does stress. Things often get said in the heat of the moment that can be taken very personally. When in doubt assume good intent and clarify. For example if Suzie speaks to you sharply you need to consider the situation first. Is she super busy or visibly stressed? Has she spoken to you like that frequently? What is going on at that exact moment? Then when the storm has passed you can mention to her that she seemed angry with you and is there anything you need to talk about. I can nearly guarantee she had no idea how she came across and probably didn't mean to. It's happened to me and I've been guilty of it at times myself. On the other hand if Suzie is just a beyatch all the time don't sweat it. She's miserable and it has nothing to do with you. Find a mentor and let it roll of your back.