Gennaver

Last year I got hired as an in house float nurse and was SO very surprised to find out how much I liked working the Psych ward. I have always been a fan of cognitive behavioral theory and "owning" our own roles in life issues and when I was younger worked as an assistant in two residential facilities for children and learned of "milieu therapy." Milieu therapy means, basically, respond appropriately to whatever the resident/client/patient's reactions are in order for them to see what "appropriate" is. I see them as people suffering and I also see them as "us" in the worst situations of our lives. I'm not an enabler at all and I really appreciate how working in psych has helped me function outside of the clinical setting with people who are not necessarily appropriate with me, (meaning how well it helped me use boundaries.) Jen

I agree with you, the OP doesn't have an internal problem. She or he likely isn't a "server-helper" person who is willing to be treated badly for the greater good of 'helping.' Not everyone gets an internal reward for doing selfless acts behind the scenes and being unrecognized, demeaned or dismissed. We don't all have that same reward center. Even my own 'server-helper' rewards are greatly diminished after 30 some years in hospital settings. It is a different generation of patients and some definitely do have the entitlement expectations which many baby boomers are proud to have, (it isn't bad, it is what drove their generation.) however, as a helper server personality I am not an enabler myself and don't like it either. Jen

Hi, I think you did an amazing job getting the degree, a job AND doing 3 years in the ED as well as outpatient IV transfusion clinic. Shoot, lady all of this on top of you disliking it. I'd say you ought to give yourself one huge heckuva congratulations. This is not an easy job for people who love it let alone tolerate it. There are people who love it but after a couple decades, also, hate people's expectations. Shoot, I read some replies where folks got defensive towards you instead of having compassion and guess what, ta dah, they just displayed that they, themselves, were more annoyed than had compassion for you. Anyways, they proved your point Nurse and yes, it is perfectly A-OK to walk away and hold your head up hight with a good conscious. You tried. You worked hard and gave what you could. Bedside or patient side nursing is not the end all be all of nursing. We bet berated, abused, talked down too and taken for granted, by the patients, their family, the corporate health environment. I'm glad you posted this. I look forward to finding other areas to work as a nurse or in a post nurse career because I suspect MANY of us are going to be looking for work... Jen

Honesty, with discretion but, always honesty.

Hello, If they are hiring for night shift they need someone who wants to be on nightshift. I would be honest and not apply for this job but, let them know what you are interested in. I don't think you'd be helping them, or yourself, to take this position knowing you don't really want to work the hours it requires. If you do take this position and want to transition to days in a year then they will have to hire someone else but, really, they likely will not transition you to days in a year and you might get stuck. Jen

Hi, Firstly, I am sure you know by now that taking responsibility is NOT all your fault. The only error I see is in leaping in to quickly. Also, leaving after you realized there were incompatibilities in the very early stages, (i.e. not being informed of 5 weeks of day shifts AND leaving because of a handsy violating creep are not something to take blame for.) Jen

I hear you and agree that hiring algorithms and resume scrubbers weed out those people who may actually be the best match if met in person. Instead, facilities are likely filtering out as many good and letting in as many not so great, as they did before. The automated scrubbers are just flipping the way it happens. It is no fun, I know.

Yes. One told me at the end of the interview, "I have to let you know we need you to defend or explain your credit report." I was lucky that mine was easily explained and they still offered me the position. Thankfully because I'd flown in from out of state to interview. Jen

I agree, as far as I understand it medicating someone as you described is a chemical restraint. Jen

It really seems like it could be your references if you landed an interview and felt they went great. Possibly weed out your reference list to people you really know can give you a good recommendation and are people whose recommendation has validity to it. Jen p.s. edit to add: maybe check your credit score or even online reputation score, (I did this myself after several no replies to my application. it turned out my online myelife reputation score was terrible due to myelife needing clarification on information and my credit score had a fake debt and false information on there from a previous malicious landlord. Once I fixed that I got two interviews and hired by two places within a month or so!!)

Good luck to all the USAGPAN applicants. Its been over 9 years since I 'started' that program. However, it was a long time ago in the scheme of things and I only lasted 5 weeks into the awesome program. I was Active Duty and earned a "C" grade in a condensed length class, (and I was dropped from the program.) However, I was also the "last" non ICU nurse they accepted so at least, or unfortunately, they closed the door on non ICU nurses after me. There are many good things to say about the educators there, just awesome, (and also am VERY glad my washout happened early rather than later.) Jen p.s. signed no regrets

This morning I finalized my decision in my own recent orientation situation. I had 4 shifts orientation, (maybe it was 5 but it ended over 2 weeks ago, these were 8 hour shifts.) I had 2 shifts on one unit and 2 on the other. They were waiting for me to get my full time job schedule and me to call them back with my availability. I'd planned to call them any day to tell them I wouldn't proceed past orientation. "Trust our gut" right? The day before yesterday the assistant DON called me from vacation to ask if I was going to stay and if I did they would agree to give me the part time position I agreed to before orientation and to not offer my last minute shifts. However, the very next day they were very short and needed someone. I agreed, and agreed to work yesterday, (my first day off of orientation.) One nurse was on a scheduled time off, her vacation and the unit secretary wasn't there that day. At shift change the evening nurse was 'hot' about something not getting done, (understandably and she and I both spoke strongly but, moved past it.) I told her it was my first day off of orientation and I was doing the best I could. Within moment, the DON showed up and asked me to make sure I did 'this' before I left, (it was a phone call regarding an admission from the night before by the same afternoon nurse.) The DON pointed out the phone number I needed to call and stood over my shoulder offering no help as I asked her, "what do I need to do or say exactly?" It was a call to out of state family about a dementia patient on admission paperwork that was something I'd never done before. Anyway, when I left I felt bad about the patients that heard the loud conversations and after a great day taking care of patients I felt like the DON was more of a toxic micromanager than a team leader, (I mean really, what the hay was stopping her from making the call while the newly off of orientation nurse was finishing her charting?) Still, while it was nice to get a days pay, my gut was right. I worked one day, as a last minute fill in, off of orientation and I will not work another for that facility. Jen p.s. yes, I think our gut and spider sense is right, if it doesn't feel right in orientation, take it as a good indicator and move on. p.p.s. edit to add: I am very lucky I got hired by another place at the same time and it is a huge difference in culture. It really makes it easier but, I do agree to trust your gut and save your sense of wellness

I want to share a link here that lists out some options at the end, (it also lists some traits of toxic bosses.) https://fairygodboss.com/articles/signs-of-toxic-boss

As you describe above it surely does not sound like verbal abuse and honestly, even if you were verbally abusive wouldn't she have to first give a. verbal warning before writing you up? I would consult with Human Resources higher than her because it sounds like she definitely retaliated. By the way, her succeeding to sedate a patient as a restraint is definitely against the National Patient Safety guidelines. I think she is making violations in writing you up also. Jen

I just got the "robokiller" app on my phone. It has the option to use "answer bots" to keep the robocallers on the line as long as possible with prerecorded answering hassles. I enabled that too, (because those phone bots are absolutely out of control.) I don't really feel like my reply is completely appropriate here but, possibly justified to share the idea of using apps like the Robokiller and giving them a dose of their own rubbish. Robokiller was created after the government asked the public for help with this phone issue and in 2018 it was revealed. I suspect there are more. Jen

I think you could, in good conscience, apologize to her for surprising her in front of a patient like that instead of telling her to the side in private. I think you were correct and I also can see where she may have felt humiliated, rather than take it in the appropriate light that she should have if she had a mindset on patient care instead of her pride. I mean, really, "calling her out" by offering her advice on a b/p cuff is not at all how I saw it. Then again, the mindset of someone who has a HUGE ego is what I see her as. Still, in good conscience, I think you could apologize to her for offending her pride, (or whatever fluff words she needs to hear,) in front of a patient. Jen

Have you asked the boss about this? If you do not ask him or her then they cannot fix the pay. Jen

Yes, Post puberty mumps can fry testes and ovaries causing fertility failures in both. Jen

Hi, I'm over 50 and the physical stressors I've had in med/surg have been more than in any rehab I worked in, (including my time as a CNA too.) In Rehab there are enforced safety measures for lifting generally because the fall risk is high. There are also physical therapy and occupational therapy in place to work with the patients. Jen

I really do like when someone pulls out something that I overlooked. There is definitely something to this to ruminate over. There are a lot of things that the original poster has in her thoughts and maybe the one she hasn't isolated yet as a possible factor that needs attention is the elephant in the room? Not saying you need to do anything drastic but, maybe this is a huge possible area of dissatisfaction, or causing the inability to be happy with other things. Jen

Hello, Stress and circadian rhythms strongly affect trying to get pregnant, (stress strongly affect a LOT but, I know you know this.) A break from nursing sounds in order. In my case I really wanted children, although catching mumps from a patient while working at a Chicago hospital, (although with 3 other nurses who caught it,) caused ovarian failure and menopause. It took a decade to come to terms with it. I wish you the ultimate best. Jen

I agree, I feel like they are chasing to find solutions to loosing PM shift nurses. The job I applied for was a weekender double shift but, the manager said it was off the table for me due to my being in the Reserves, (granted, not right but understandable and not a concern.) Then she asked me to work the 2-10 and even though I agreed it took a couple days before I called her back and told her I would not be happy with that position and I really wanted the shift I applied for. They called back and offered me a PRN 8 hour dayshift position and it works great with my other job. I applied for both jobs thinking they'd work well with each other but, I can see that even the flip flop is not going to work. I should just now be off of orientation and they are about to put me onto the schedule. However, I know what my next, and last, conversation with the manager will be. Jen

Hello, I recently left, after 12 years and was a direct commission also and went to BOLC. I never heard of the DCC but it sounds like a great idea. Jen p.s. edit to add: in my BOLC course we didn't have the "customs and courtesies" class for one hour but were told to find this information on youtube, (operational tempo didn't have time.) So, yes, I definitely feel a DCC is a great idea. Especially if a DC officer wants a chance at a career.

I'm in a similar situation myself now. I got hired by two places, both PRN. One is a LTC facility with 8 hour day shift, PRN part time. This works because I can fit it in nicely with the other job that is full time 12 hour dayshifts in a hospital. However the LTC is now discussing going to 12 hour shifts and in order to keep both I'd end up working five 12 hour shifts a week. I'm in orientation and on boarding at both but, my decision will have to come very soon because things have changed with the hours at the LTC. Likely that will be the one I let go because they are "changing" on me. Jen

I've driven past this plenty of times, when I lived near Barstow, CA. have you ever been to Primm? I'd suggest a visit and a test drive of this commute as nothing more than a recon visit. Traffic on the weekends for the Vegas weekenders, going either way, is going to add hours to that commute. It is also a highway that can get backed up for many more hours when the semi trucks roll over as they seem to do in those very high winds too. Jen p.s. I had no clue until I did this ride just how hard and long and slow and dangerous it can be, especially from Prim to the passes. edit to add: Primm is a gas stop on the way from LA to Vegas and has a shopping mall, and two casinos and a couple of gas stations, that is it...