Hi everyone,
I want to preface this post by saying that I know I will probably come across as incredibly ungrateful, particularly in the current job market...trust me, I wouldn't be posting this if I wasn't incredibly conflicted. And I apologize for rambling...I tend to do that when I'm really stressed out 
First, some background information:
I graduated with my BSN last December, and took/passed the N-CLEX in February. The specialty I've always been enamored with is women's health (mainly L&D, but I love general gynecology as well) - I really want to go to grad school as soon as possible so I can complete my master's and become a nurse-midwife. In addition to my OB rotation, I did my management and capstone clinicals on labor and delivery units. Of course, I know L&D positions are incredibly hard to come by, especially for new grads - most of the hospitals around me who had OB positions posted would write "NEW GRADS WILL NOT BE CONSIDERED FOR THIS POSITION!!!!" (seriously, all caps/exclamation points and everything...talk about discouraging!). Since I knew going straight to grad school wasn't a choice (at least, not if I wanted to be able to afford rent/food while in school!), I applied on units that were hiring new grads (you know, all two of them...sorry, I told you I ramble).
The situation:
I was incredibly lucky, and after a month of hearing absolutely nothing (I count those "we appreciate your interest but have chosen someone with more experience for the position" e-mails in the "nothing" category), I landed an interview - and got an offer! It's not related to OB at all, but it still sounded like an amazing opportunity: it's for the first PCU at a major downtown hospital, and the unit will be opening in a couple months. So, not only can I pay rent now (hooray!), but I'll have the chance to be part of the birth of a unit, which seems to be an incredibly rare and exciting thing to be a part of. I accepted the job, and started orientation the week after - I'm now on week 2.
The thing that makes me 
at night:
So, a few days ago, my capstone instructor called to let me know that she will be leaving her position as an RN to become the L&D clinical instructor at her hospital...and she wants to make sure I apply for her position, because the manager will be posting it soon. I told her I had already accepted a position and was on orientation, and would feel awful leaving a job after only a few weeks/months, but she just kept telling me she would let me know when it was posted. If she had just been telling me that another nurse quit and a position would be open, I could easily let it go and stay where I am - but seriously. She is trying to make sure that I get HER position - what an incredible honor to have your mentor recommend you for her own job!
In addition: now that I'm on orientation, I'm finding out a little more about the patient population of our unit, and it turns out the nurse recruiter didn't quite know what she was talking about. She made it sound like we would be getting the patients that were stable enough to get out of critical care, but too complex for med-surg - and now it sounds like most of our patients will be either bariatric or going through withdrawal.
The conflicting voices that I can't get out of my head:
I have no idea what to do - I keep going over the pros and cons of both in my head. On the one hand, I know how disrespectful it would be to leave my position for another one; I would be wasting all of the money they have put into my hiring/training process, and I'm not even on the unit yet. It would also be really unfair to the manager who's trying to put together a unit (and I guess other new grads, but honestly, most of us who have been hired on the unit ARE new grads and she wants to hire plenty more). Also, the hospital I'm at right now is a HUGE health system in my state, and they're getting even bigger - I don't want to be "blacklisted" from the organization, particularly because they own most of the hospitals in the state that employ nurse-midwives. Finally, even though my benefits are kind of crappy at my current hospital, the L&D job would be at a county hospital that mostly serves the local immigrant population and those on Medicaid - which is actually the population I prefer, but I've been told the insurance they offer is pretty bad.
But on the other hand...nursing dream job aside, I never saw myself staying on this unit for that long anyway. I told myself I would stay at least a year, but now I keep wondering if that would be an even bigger slap in the face to them: they spend $60,000+ to train me, and I leave before 2013? Also, I really DO want to go to grad school in the near future - I turn 23 next week, and unless I love L&D nursing so much that I truly can't bring myself to leave it (even to further my education), I would really like to be a practicing CNM before I'm 30. I need as much experience as I can get. And crappy insurance, a probable pay cut, and worse working conditions aside...I would be doing the specialty I'm passionate about, the thing that got me into nursing in the first place!
I asked my preceptor about working there per diem on the weekends, but she said they always hire really experienced people for those positions (which makes sense...it's hard to become an expert when you're just moonlighting a few times a month). I could just wait a year and then look for other L&D positions, but everything I see requires 1-2 years of "recent experience in the specialty" - which makes it impossible to GET any experience in the specialty (I don't think being present for the "birth of a unit" counts as L&D experience!). Also, it's worth mentioning that I'm freaking out so much about whether I should even bother APPLYING for the L&D position - I don't want to offend my preceptor (and L&D contact/reference) by not applying, but I don't want to have my manager find out, lose my current job, and then not get hired at the other job, either.
So, that's it - if you actually read through the whole post, I commend you 
What would you do if you were in this position? Seasoned nurses - do you have any advice?
Thanks,
Nursing Noob
UCI&USFMom
49 Posts
go go go, follow what your heart says. If there's an opportunity go and grab it. Apply and if you get it, great. If you don't get it, you did not lose anything. We make our decisions that will make us happy!