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Discussion

offended co worker

hi ,

i made a comment to my coworker and he was offended. it was a meant as a harmless tease and just feel terrible about it. i knew something was wrong because my co worker sort of shut down. i asked twice what was wrong. finally today i asked again and he reminded me what it was i had done. here is the event:

i stayed over to draw a lab which had come in right at shift change. i dont like to leave things undone out of courtesy to the next shift. my co worker being nice said "hey i got this" i said, no i don't mind". he "go home, i got it" well i made a joke and "i said ok be a control freak". i was totally joking, but immediately wished i had not said it. well he walked off, i drew the lab. i found him and said i was just teasing and was sorry if it offended him. he said "no way , all is fine"

well i forgot about it. so much so that i did not even put it together. he had to remind me that was the issue. i apologized and believe me i was sincere. i told him it was meant to be funny but i see it was inappropriate and asked for him to please forgive me. he said he did but stressed that he would just want to communicate about work and patients from now on. i said of course and that i would never say anything like that again.

i can tell he is upset with me still and i don't blame him. i know i crossed the line, but i felt close enough to tease but i know i was wrong, i take responsibility and have learned something.

i believe that if he wants to stay standoffish and leery he can and i don't blame him. i just feel terrible about it. i know the best thing is just to let it go. i wont bother him again by bringing it up or trying to chit chat. i just fill like a dummy..

it helps just to write it down here. the sad part is he was the nicest guy to me, he encouraged me and taught me so much. i like him so well that is why i teased a little. but instead i hurt someone i really liked and appreciated.

i hope in time he forgives me and we can move past this. i am just sad about it. i wish i could have explained it better to him today, but i think he knows i am saddened and so sorry. thanks for listening and i would welcome any feedback

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    tell him to quit being a whiney baby lol sheesh

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    He needs to get over it!!! That was not horrible!! You were joking!

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    Sounds as if he is overly sensitive. I'll bet he still makes mistakes himself. Just carry on. Bring him some make-up cookies one day, then let the matter go.

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    he sounds like a control freak!

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    Holy cow- this dude needs an urgent sense of humor transplant.

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    My guess is that maybe others have accused him, not jokingly, about being a control freak, or maybe he worries himself about whether or not he is a control freak. I agree with others that he seems to be overreacting, but my guess is that you (however accidentally) hit something that is a sore point for him.

    Anyway, lesson learned. Hopefully some day he'll get over it and fully forgive you, but if not, it's his loss.

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    It happens. It will eventually blow over. Just let it go. Best of luck.

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    oh god, tell that dude to put it in a bubble and let it go! That is so petty. In nursing we learn (or should!) to bring a sense of humor in order to get through a day. Perhaps he needs to learn. Don't worry yourself (too late!) over it. Big deal, harmless (though sounds right on target to me) joke. Really, don't let it bother you and stop being so responsible for every little comment, you sound as though you are worried you might get in trouble. It is nonsense!

    Truthfully, you sound so hurt that I would think you have a little crush on the guy. Let it go and it'll pass. Stay who you are and joke as you see fit. Being fun may just rub off on that stick in the mud.

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    Well it is good that you felt bad and already approached him to apologize about it. It shows that you have a conscience. Since he is still not over it, how about bringing him some food/baking something for him (to demonstrate your apology) the next time you guys have a shift together?

    You never know if he was having a bad day or if something is stressful in his personal life . . .

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    Sheesh is right. He'd probably have quit after hello with me.

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    Some people offend easily. He doesn't sound very easygoing. We all say stuff without thinking, I'm more vocal than other people so would say what I thought and if people don't like it, well there you go.

    Just crawl and apologise like mad. If he doesn't accept that, just keep smiling, saying hello etc and acting normal and he will get over it.

    I wouldn't have been offended - I would probably have laughed my head off myself! But then I tend to not take people and situations too seriously - we all have bad days (though I am serious when the sitatuation warrants).

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    I agree with the other posters....he seems a little oversensitive to me. I tend to be sarcastic and when I feel comfortable with people I can totally do what you did. For me, I would not have given it a second thought if you had said that to me. Since he was offended, you were sensitive to that and apologized. That should be the end of it and he really needs to get over it. If he keeps his panties in a wad about it, that is HIS deal, not yours and I would not lose any sleep about it. I wonder if his basic personality is a little passive agressive and he is enjoying seeing you squirm and fret about it. Sheesh...people need to lighten up!!!! Relax and don't worry about it anymore!!!

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