Teen daughters 1st pelvic exam... - page 3

Hi all! I think this is the right place to post?? Any ways, my 16 year old daughter has to have a pelvic exam and is absolutly petrified. She has heard the many horror stories from all her... Read More

  1. by   ShandyLynnRN
    Mandi... from your previous posts, it sounds like you have the lifestyle that requires a yearly pelvic exam and pap.

    I don't remember all the details, but if I recall, the criteria for yearly gyn exams include age 18 or over, sexually active, or any "female" problems.
  2. by   tattooednursie
    lol, what kind of life style do you mean?

    I'm not very active, I just lay there. J/K

  3. by   ShandyLynnRN
    lol, no disrespect intended... I just got the impression from some of the things that you said that well, you know.

    Anyway, if so, get your yearlies! It's important!
  4. by   tattooednursie
    Ohhhh! okay, I get it now I think I probably should get my yearly's done then. *blushes*
  5. by   mark_LD_RN
    itsme the main thing is explain it to her well,try to help her relax and besure the doc is good with younger patients. my oldest went to a female ob gyn because wifes usually doc was out. well she had a horrible exam, second one by the NP was no better. they did not comfort her were not gentle and worst of all took no account of her being a virgin at the time, needless to say what the outcome of that was. she now refuses to go back for anymore exams. I have almost been able to talk her it to seeing one of our midwives. but no luck yet.

    FLYNURSE- yes some docs do not have a female in with them for exams I know a few that don't unless the patient requests it. it is mainly for the old liability thing I personally do not have a female in with me when i examine a patient unless they request it. and by the way you have every right to request a female be present if it makes you more comfortable.
  6. by   Passin' Gas
    Ok, so annual pelvic exams are not the highlight of the day. However, they are not THAT traumatic of an experience if discussed ahead of time with young women and dealt with compassion and warmth (especially the speculum!). A little TLC and knowledge goes a long way.

    From the surgery side, as a CRNA, I see WAY too many young women (early 20's) coming in for diseases that could have been picked up sooner had they had regular screening. And as a consequence are dealing with more invasive alternatives for treatment. The results frequently lead to loss of ability to bear a child on their own.

    Maybe I'm "too surgical" or the outstanding nurse practitioner who I have been going to for years does such a wonderful job that I do not dread the "annual visit". It's a fact of life for a responsible female to take care of herself. Period. (no pun intended).

    Even a celibate nun (pun intended here) should have regularly recommended pelvic exams. I'm in an age range where annual exams are recommended even with negative results. I understand that for younger women it has been adjusted. Whatever the recommendations are they needed to be followed.

    Last point: a woman is entitled to a chaperone at any time no matter the gender of the examiner. Sexual harrassment is not always XX-XY.
  7. by   mark_LD_RN
    Originally posted by Passin' Gas

    Last point: a woman is entitled to a chaperone at any time no matter the gender of the examiner. Sexual harrassment is not always XX-XY.
    excellent point i usually mention that part but forgot.thanks for bringing it up

    oh by the way the only person i know of that had be accused of being inappropriate with a patient was a female L&D nurse i worked with a few yrs ago. she got fired for her transgression:

    i can completely understand why a person may want a chaperone present, and i take no offense to a patient asking for one. I also ask the patient who she wants in to me i don't care if its just me and her or if she has a room full it's her choice I just dont go for the people who want to take my picture doing it
    Originally posted by mark_LD_RN
    I just dont go for the people who want to take my picture doing it
    Oy... there's one of those in every group, isn't there.
  9. by   tattooednursie
    When she has it done, let us know how she did ok. I understand her pain. I am almost 18 and still pertified of them, and I'm sure there are people in their 50's who are still petrified of them.
    I hope she gets through it. I'm sure this one will break the ice a little bit. I know that very few women, if any really enjoy that.
  10. by   NurseRachy
    I just had a thought that maybe mother and daughter could go out for lunch and or a movie afterwards- you know- sweeten an unpleasant experience. I think i would really appreciate that.
    Just a thought... Rachel
  11. by   nadia562002
    I had my first experience at 19 as I was joining the military. I got an old fart who knew what he was doing at least. I had my share of anxiety over and still do. I had a bad experience a couple years later with a student PA who could not find the cervix. She asked if it would be ok if she had another doc come in to find it. That doc happened to be a coworker so I said absolutely not. I have decided since then that I do not care the sex of the doc doing it. Its a matter of knowing how to do it right without too much searching.

    Last year I went to another new doc. He must have thought I was about to run like hell out of that office the way I looked. At the age of 28, I still think they are the worst thing a girl can be subjected to. But I do it only because I should and patients expect the nurse to do it too when the nurse tells them that they should. We have to live by example even in this. We nurses make bad patients anyways.
  12. by   RNonsense
    I still cover my eyes and pretend it just ain't happening...
    Fact of life though. Have to suck it up and just do it.

    She needs to know how very important monthly breast exams are too!
  13. by   colleen10
    Oh Jeez, this takes me back to my first pelvic exam. I was 18 and getting ready to head off to college so it was time to start seeing a gyn.

    My mum set up an appointment with her ancient OB/GYN. She told me "this doc. (male) is so nice and sweet and gentle, very grandfatherly (which creeped the bejezis out of me)."

    Well, by the time I actually got into the office for a check-up the old guy retired and was replaced (unbeknowst to us) with a very young, most handsomest man I think I have ever seen in my life!

    Can you imagine, your very first exam sitting in that room all by yourself half naked and then having a Mel Gibson, Martin Sheen, Antonia Banderas doc walk through the door quite unexpectedly! The best part was after the exam and I had gotten changed the doc. saw me in his office to go over everything and make sure that I was "ok" with everything this being my first exam and all. I requested that they let my mother come in for the discussion and you should have seen the look on her face!!!! Still makes me laugh to think about it.

    But anyway, I think if you have an open relationship with your daughter talk to her about the importance of having yearly check-ups and explain to her what exactly is going on and how short the whole thing really is. I also agree that if you can talk to the doc. or a nurse beforehand to let them know that this is her first exam and that she is nervous about it maybe they can be extra gentle and supportive of her. My doc was great. He told me he understood that this was my first one and how nervous I must be, but assured me that all women go through this and when he was doing the exam he made a point of explaining what I would be feeling and what and why he was doing what he was doing.

    Now, I have no problems going to the OB/GYN for my annual check-ups and I don't get worried or nervous over the pelvic exam. I think having that first good experience helped a lot with that. Finding a good doctor is important too. My current doc. is a hoot! He even puts word games/puzzles on the ceiling above the exam table so that when you are laying there you have something to do.