Nurse Poem (too funny)

[Brian, ASN, RN]

Also found on the SNURSE-L listserv.

> A nurse's job goes on and on,

> doing tasks from dusk to dawn.

> There's mes, there's records, and requests to write,

> running tests all day and night.

A nurse's job goes on and on,

and on and on and on and ON,

There's screaming patients down the hall,

In 13, Aggie's had a fall.

> Though busy with input on computer lap,

> they fluff up pillows so I can take a nap.

> The nurse of today is the doctor's right arm,

> guiding the patient through sickness and harm.

Our pillows are all canvas-coated,

Concrete-filled and rather bloated,

We try our best demands to meet,

But - this sorry doctor's all left feet.

> A compassionate nurse in word and deed,

> is always there in time of need.

> It's from A to Z the jobs that you do,

> we can't make it through life without assiatance from you.

They never come when he's unwell -

I'm hammering this friggin' bell!

How'm I s'posed to get a bottle...

(This screaming child I'm about to throttle.)

> I've seen this nurse in many a land,

> from hospital ship to war's blood soaked sand.

> Through pain and sickness; lost hope and dispair,

> the corpsman, the nurse, you are physically there.

My dearest dream, my fondest wish -

That my next nurse be speaking English!

Through ten long hours, no how, no way,

Couldn't understand a word she'd say.

> I may never need a nuclear tech.

> But without a nurse my life's ship is sure to wreck.

> Praise the Lord, your heart cries a nurse is here.

Life's ship be damned, my 'roids are smarting,

Leave off your senseless, endless charting!

Ring cushions by the truckload... oi!

That electric wheelchair's not a toy!

> It does not matter if you're young or old,

> the touch of a nurse has the warmth of gold.

> I'm just, as you see, an old military guy,

> but I've received your compassion from land, sea, and sky.

The old ones moan, and wheeze, and creak;

The young ones dither, far too meek

To drag me off this comfy bed

And walk me, like the doctor said.

> As I'm finishing life and all my friends have died,

> give me a blessing from God and put a nurse at my side.

> Yes, praise the Lord my heart cries as I glance through a tear,

> it's like back in Mom's arms when the Nurses are here.

My nurse is fully six foot three,

No mother in compassion he,

But "mother"'s what I call him when

He treads on my damn oxygen!

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Brian Short

WORLDWIDE NURSE: The Internet's Nursing Directory

wwnurse.com/