New grad advice?

[wakeuptothesun86]

Hey everyone :)

So I'm a new grad nurse who's been working at a hospital for a little over two months. This will be my third week on my own after seven weeks of orientation on my med-surg unit. I'm only allowed to have six patients (haha, "only") until I hit my six month mark, but after that anything goes. By that, I mean it's not uncommon for nurses to get hit with 10-11 patients on a shift. I'm the only PM nurse since everyone else works twelves, days, or nights, so my shifts get a little crazy with admissions, discharges, and picking up patients for nurses who leave at 7 pm.

Does anyone have any tips for coping with the stress of it all? I feel a little blindsided because the nurses I met in clinicals only ever had four, maybe five patients max and the crazy ratios at my hospital were never mentioned in my interview process. The turnover rates are high, the staff morale is low, and many of the patients get labeled as drug seekers. The nurses are too busy to do anything other than pass meds, do their tasks, and chart, and the patients are very keenly aware of the fact that we don't actually have time for them. Plus, I've heard multiple stories of the administration trying to find ways to fire people on my unit; even if it is for good reason, it makes me feel uncomfortable and the environment feels insecure.

I feel like I'm doing more or less okay in the moment, but honest to goodness, I don't EVER want to have more than six patients. I feel like I'm barely able to keep my head above water as is, and I don't feel comfortable or safe taking care of more than my current load. Unfortunately, it's in my future unless I found another job, but I don't know if it would look bad to leave after only six months? I tell myself that I should be grateful to have a job at all and that lots of hospitals are understaffed, but the stress is overwhelming.

I feel like something's gotta give. I became a nurse for the love of caring for people spiritually just as much as physically, and now I find that I'm becoming bitter, cynical, and somewhat apathetic to the patients at my job. My loved ones have noticed that I'm becoming more callous. This is not me. This is not who I ever want to be as a nurse. I just don't know how long I should wait and put up with all the crazy before it becomes a good enough reason to leave.

[Ruby Vee, BSN]

I started out in Med/Surg over thirty years ago. On the day shift, I had 4-5 patients. On the PM shift 8-15, and on the night shift either one hall of 15 patients, or both halls -- 31. Because my floor was more medical than surgical, admissions and discharges probably weren't as crazy as yours, although hanging blood and antibiotics took up a lot of my time. My first year as a nurse was awful. I cried every day on the way to work, and most days I cried all the way home as well. The RNs I worked with weren't nice to me -- they were all convinced I was too useless to bother with. (Did I mention that I was the first BSN hired at that hospital -- the rest were diploma nurses who graduated from their school or experienced nurses from other hospitals?). I didn't have the luxury of quitting -- I was putting my then-husband through school and supporting us both.

I'm glad now that I stuck that job out for two years. No other job I switched into would have been any easier for me -- I had tons and tons to learn. No matter where else I worked, I still would have had tons and tons to learn. Over two years, I learned enough to be (barely) competent in my next job. I also learned what I liked about that first job, what I absolutely did not want to put up with again (rotating all three shifts in the same week) and what to look for in my next job.

If there's any way you can do so, I'd encourage you to stay for the full two years. Most places won't hire a job hopper, and the employment outlook now is not nearly as rosy as it was when I was a new grad. You're a new grad, you're GOING to be miserable in your job. It's just part of becoming a nurse. Not a good part of it, but pretty much inevitable. If you leave and find another job right away, there are going to be parts of THAT job that make you miserable. At least stay a year . . . then rethink what you want to do.

Good luck.