Need help helping an unconfident nurse

Nurses Relations

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(Reposting this since I think it got lost during the revamp. I can't find it anywhere but if it's still around, mods can feel free to merge or delete the threads!)

I don't consider myself a particularly experienced or knowledgeable nurse. I mean, I know enough to do my job and get through most days without asking others for help (so many things can be looked up on my own), but if I don't know something and can't find the answer, yes, I'll ask for help until I feel confident enough to do it on my own.

I have a colleague, however, who can't really seem to stop asking for help for simple things. She's been working for about the same amount of time as me (roughly 1.5 years) yet she still asks for help on things like simple dressings, PCAs, or PICCs (all of which are common on our floor). I've helped her numerous times and each time, it's like she feels content to allow me to show her what to do. I say, no, you have to do it yourself and I'll watch and help if you get stuck. I show her, get her to demonstrate skills back to me, etc., but I feel like a week or two later, she's asking me about the same things! I'll tell her, "You can do it yourself. I've seen you do it" and she answers "If I make a mistake, it's my license" or "Every time I do it, bad things happen."

When she first came, she asked another nurse to watch her give Lactulose. It took her months before she would even touch a PICC. She once didn't want to flush an IV because "the family is there and it makes [her] nervous." She's gotten better but she still fusses about the simplest things.

For example, one day, I had some extra time and asked her if she needed any help. She said she had two packing dressings to do on one patient (one on each foot) and she was freaking out about it. I told her we could tag-team it - I'd do one dressing while she did the other. We went into the room. We took off the old dressings and there wasn't even anything to pack - both wounds were small, relatively shallow craters. I did the one wound (only took a couple of minutes), looked up, and saw my colleague hadn't done the other. She then asked me to do the other wound, too! I told her, no, she could do the wound on her side. I can't remember what she said but she kept insisting and pushing the dressing supplies to me. I felt very awkward arguing in front of the patient so I just did it myself since it would only take an extra couple of minutes.

Just recently, she kept fussing that she had three wound dressings to do in a day. It was hard to feel sympathy because I knew a "big wound dressing" for her could be nothing to anyone else; and, if I offered my help, I'd probably end up having to do the dressings myself.

It's just very frustrating. I've heard other nurses tell me similar stories (though, maybe less kindly than I'd like). When she asks for help so much, it adds to everyone else's work. As I've said, I've tried encouraging, teaching, and having her do things herself, but progress is slow. And if you deny her help or tell her she can do it herself, she goes off and complains about how "no one helps around here"!

I have a nurse working with me who is a little like this. Although she is really a fantastic nurse overall, she is really nervous when it comes to procedures, blood draws, intradermals, etc. She always finds me and asks if I will do it or have someone else do it. I have adopted tough love and I just send her in to get the job done and offer to be right outside if she needs help. I feel that if I am in the room with her, she may be more nervous and more likely to ask me to do it for her and I certainly don't want the patient to pick up on the vibe. More often than not, when she knows I am just outside to bail her out if needed, she gets it done without difficulty and rarely needs me to come help. It has just required practice...not only in developing her skills, but practice in developing her confidence too. Don't continue to enable. This nurse may hurt someone because she is lacking skills. GOOD LUCK!

Oh, honey, it seems to me you are SO being played. Not good for the patients, or you, or the "nurse" in question.

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