Management Type

[enchantmentdis, BSN, RN]

To Nurse Managers and RNs: I would like to know what management type the following is, if there is a particular name for it:

Your Nurse Manager calls you into the office and says "Can you tell me about your visit with patient A". Bear in mind, the nurse may have seen said patient months ago and the survey may have come back and the family may have had a complaint or concern. The name of the patient rings a bell, but you need your memory jogged, so your manager gives you the date of the visit, and tells you what the visit to the patient was for.

You finally remember the in-home visit, but you are trying to figure out why you are in the manager's office on the hot seat, and come right out and ask her "is there something wrong done at the visit?" "Do you need me to sign the write up paper, I have 3 patients left to see?" Manager divulges no information, and repeats, "Can you tell me about the visit?"

You jog your memory, open your work computer, read your charting, and recite details about the visit. The manager asks you a few pointed questions about the visit, seeming to be looking for something in particular, but never tells you what the concern is. YET. Finally after 30 or 40 minutes of going around in circles, she divulges bits and pieces of what the family was upset about, and you are asked to explain your rationale of how you dealt with the issue or the family.

Finally, close to the end of the meeting the manager tells you what the complaint was, tells you what you should have or should not have done, says you will be called back in the office in the upcoming days, but that the issue will be further investigated first. God, I hate this manager. Later, after being called back into the office, you are written up.

She says, "We just wanted to get what you had to say" as she hands you the paper you must sign.

The meetings take forever because this style I find very disturbing and I am not giving the manager exactly what she wants---I get the feeling she wants me to say I did something wrong at the visit right up front so she won't have to do it, I believe--that's nonsense. She wants me to trip myself up and have my stories not match. I've been to law school. That will not happen.

SO WHAT THE HECK IS THIS MANAGEMENT STYLE? HOW CREEPY! AND HOW DO I GET HER OFF MY BACK. I AM 49 years old for heaven sake!

I am used to a former manager at this same job taking you into the office and saying, "Okay, the reason why you are here is because patient x's family said this and that, what can you tell me about the interaction?" And she never had the HR person in the room. I much prefer this approach as it is efficient and not embarrasing; and the manager in this case is not trying to get you to implicate yourself. She comes right out and tells you what the issue is IN THE BEGINNING. Also, you don't necessarily get written up at the end of the meeting because she has BELIEVED your side of the story. The other management style is a type of "baiting" that I do not appreciate because after an hour-long meeting I still get the feeling she is upset that she could not "trip me up". I also feel like she doesn't believes a word I am saying. She also has the human resources manager in there with us the whole time, writing every thing out on a pad of paper. They are friends. I just get the feeling this manager really enjoys this aspect of the job and it is driving me nuts. I spend every day wondering if I will get a page, email, text, or phone call asking me to come into the office again. It's funny; she seems like a nice person otherwise. I don't want to hate her, but this has happened four times in the past year(when our census climbed and nurses left in droves and the rest of us were over-worked).

It's a shame; I have worked here almost three years and my problem started when this manager took over about a year ago. Recently she had a health problem that kept her out of the office over a month and I was in heaven. She has a lot of drama in her family with loser kids, etc...she's raising a grandchild--How do I know this? Because she chit-chats with me before the HR manager comes into the meeting. I am so hoping the drama of her life and health will get her the ax so I won't have to put up with her anymore.

When I leave this job I will specifically state in my resignation that I am leaving just because of her management style. What is the name of this exasperating management style? Anyone?