Is this it?

A bit of background: I'm newly qualified, I trained in London but have moved out of London to a smaller city for my first job. I have been working autonomously for about a month now.

I just didn't anticipate hating my job right now. Throughout training, my student colleagues were worrying if they had chosen the right job. I never once had that worry. Although I had a range of study placements, some of which I enjoyed more than others, I never disliked the job, or had any issues with staffing. Until I moved out of London.

Basically, the staffing here is horrendous. You have 7-9 patients in the day, and 14 each at night. This is unacceptable in my opinion. Of course 80% of them are confused, there are admissions and discharges, extremely long lists of drugs to be given, all of them constantly need bedpans, etc etc. I don't feel like I'm managing anything more than getting through my day unscathed at the moment. But that's not why I started the job! It's not at all satisfying! I was so calm and kind with patients previously, and now I simply don't have time for anything other than the ever expanding list of tasks and checks and paperwork and bedpans. I always intended to be an ITU nurse anyway. But am I kidding myself? Will I hate that too? BIG sigh.