How do you make the statement "I want to help people." sound not so cliché?

Nursing Students Pre-Nursing


I have a feeling that a good majority will write that they chose to become a nurse to "help people". Although it may be the case, I also get the feeling that it's overused, and would probably not impress the admission records (since it may sound like a broken record).

However, that's genuinely my case. I really want to focus on my willingness to commit to the community, and would bring up my numerous community service commitments.

Should I still stick with "helping people" as a main reason? I know it sounds silly to even ask this question, but hey, I've heard that admission committees can be tough. That's why I am wondering if I should be unique and adapt that statement somehow, or still stick with it, since I have evidence supporting my claim (volunteer experiences) ?

You are right in thinking that many people have this reason as motivation for becoming a nurse. Although that is a great reason, you have to convey that to the admissions committee in a unique way.

I am in no way an expert on this matter, but I always enjoy readying essays that tell a story and say something about the applicant that is different from everyone else. I think adcoms want to know about you and what makes you an amazing candidate for their school. Unless there is no other place on the application to list them, I don't recommend just listing your community service experiences, but you could use a specific event from those experiences that makes you stand out or that emphasizes your desire to become a nurse. You can also tailor your essay to the school(s) to which you are applying. Try to figure out what they seem to emphasize as important in the application process and their goals for the school and outcomes for their students.

Keep in mind any word limits as you may need to condense everything you want to say. I only applied to one school and the essay was 100 words. Extremely short to convey all that I wanted to say. I had to cut out most of what I wanted to say. I picked the points that I thought would make me stand out the most and wrote about those.

Good luck writing! If you need someone to read over it, I would love to help!!

Specializes in Nursing Professional Development.

Perhaps talk about your desire to do something meaningful with your life rather than just have job to make money. That says essentially what you want to say, but opens up possibilities to expand on the theme of "meaningful" that are more complex than just "helping people."

You can help people without becoming a nurse, so why do you want to become a nurse?

Best wishes in your applications!

^Thank you for all of your responses. They're much appreciated. :)

You can help people without becoming a nurse, so why do you want to become a nurse?

That's a good point to make!

Specializes in Critical Care, Postpartum.

I sure never put "I want to help people" on my admissions essay. Why? Because it's way more than that for me. It was my great desire to be one.

You can help people without becoming a nurse, so why do you want to become a nurse?

Best wishes in your applications!

Exactly what I was going to say. Tell them a story about yourself - what you used to and why you want to switch to nursing to fulfill the goal of helping people.

Specializes in CNA.
Should I still stick with "helping people" as a main reason ?

Sure. But you need to describe how you have, or would, or want to help people.

I think using a story that is unique to you is a great idea.

Was there any event that happened in your life that made you realize that nursing was for you?

For me, it was volunteering in the pediatric cancer ward at Children's around the holidays. It was truly a life changing moment for me, and it is the reason why I decided on nursing.

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