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Discussion

How do you cope?

I'm curious, and would like to ask you all a question. I'm a pre-nursing student, and have thought about NICU and L&D as future career paths (I'm still learning about all the varied options, and hoping when I do clinicals I find my true calling). The thought of being able to help bring shiny new lives into the world, or help stabilize them so they have a chance is really appealing to me (and to think I didn't really even like children, but having my daughter a year ago changed everything! Now I "steal" babies for snuggles whenever I get a chance :o). The one major concern I have is this; I'm a highly emotional person, and even stories in the news of babies dying will haunt me and remain in my mind for days. The thought of a baby dying on my watch would be devastating. How do you all cope with that? I understand it's all part of the job, but I'm not sure I could separate myself from my emotions well enough to function in a calm manner (ie...I might fall apart at the seams myself and that wouldn't help anyone). I may just not be NICU or L&D material, but I was curious how you all cope with the sadness and loss?

Thanks for any answers you give, I appreciate it!

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    I'm not really sure. After doing it for awhile, you just sort of develop boundaries. Part of it for me is knowing that these babies are trying to learn how to live, that most of them shouldn't have been born yet and this is all they know in life. Sometimes their suffering is so great that death is almost a relief...I have a harder time with the kids who were completely fine and normal until an accident that brain damaged to almost a PVS. There are definitely some cases that will affect you more, depending on your rapport with families. You may even cry with them and that's okay too. You really won't know how it'll affect you until you're doing it. Hopefully in nursing school you'll get a chance to rotate through these specialties, and from there you will get a better sense of how you can personally handle it. You may surprise yourself! Sometimes the highly emotional ones are the ones who are needed in these settings :)

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    I pray, I seek support from my spouse, and I continue to work hard, and I continue to care for the babies.

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