Help? Interested in nursing but....

Hello! My name is Allie, I am almost 21 years old and I just dropped out of University for Psychology, because I was really unsure about what I wanted to do with my future. I am very interested in psychology, and mental health. I really love helping people, but I was discouraged by the job prospects I had heard of for psychology. And most graduates of psychology I knew went into business or human resources.

I started looking into different types of programs I could go into, and different careers to look at and one that really surprisingly caught my eye was nursing, and months later it is still on my mind. I don't know why, but I find it capturing. Not only is the job outlook incredible, but it is exactly what I want. To help people, but be selfless, compassionate, and make people feel more at ease in their situations. What I loved even more, was the seemingly unlimited possibilities. Maybe I didn't have to go into psychology after all to work with mentally ill patients. Psychiatric nursing sounded very interesting. As did many other specialties. Also, you have a lot of opportunity to grow in the field.

I am taking a 'Pre-health' program this year to get science credits I didn't previously take in high school. Then I was going to apply for rpn and bscn nursing programs and see if I can get into any of them. Otherwise I would go back into psychology I assume.

I am willing to learn a lot of new things, and work hard in school.

BUT, one thing terrifies me. And it is the level of stress in the job.

I have TERRIBLE anxiety that can spiral out of control when I feel inadequate and stressed and feel like there is too much pressure to perform. Disappointment kills me. In some ways, this is good, because although I have only ever had jobs as cashiers or baristas, I work hard so that I can perform my best and earn respect.

What I am scared of, is if at restaurants and grocery stores and cafes, I have felt extreme levels of stress where I break down (until I get used to my job) I am scared that with a job like nursing, I just will not be able to handle it. I have heard some people say 'the patient shouldn't be the doctor' and in some ways I am afraid this pertains to me.

I had one job at a restaurant that stressed me out so badly, that I was contemplating suicide. I am a hard worker, I love the sound of nursing. But what if my anxiety gets out of control and I can't do it? Would I even be able to get a job in psychiatric nursing as it is in my record I have been admitted before (stemming my interest, actually)??

Sorry this question is everywhere, but so is my mind right now.

Thank you so much