Healthfair today with ventripunctures for the first time. :(

[SouthernBelle85]

The only time I had done one is on a rubber arm. Our arms in the lab are so old and the "veins" are not good worn out plus they didn't have the arms strung up...so you didn't get any flashbacks or blood drawn practicing.

Then at the health fair, first of all I got several that didn't have good veins, I did get a few sticks but not enough. I just needed someone to guide me through the first two...but I got to the table and my instructor said so and so will help you which so and so she was a nurse or phlebotomist (not sure maybe a lab tech.). So, I kind of go okay...I've never done this...please help. (I didn't say that out loud because there was a pt). She just stood by the wall and so I take a breath and get my things...try to look for vein...which I haven't really looked for a vein on a real arm (besides mine and I have awesome veins...sorry to brag...but they are amazing) and so was like, maybe this one....and I look at her for help and she like yeah that vein...and of course I do all the steps and stick him and stick him the wrong way...it doesn't work. There went my confidence. The girl just acted like she didn't want to deal with students.

She did tell me that sometimes you have to move it or position the needle to get the blood. So I get a guy and got a flashback but it wasn't coming through so I tried doing what So and So said...but it didn't work of course and my instructor told me I was hurting him and I feel like 2 inches tall and hate myself for it. I went too far in but I didn't think I went that far...I don't know what's too far.

People freaking get this the first time and I mess up. It's like new skills I can easily just crumble under pressure. Once I know a skill then I'm good....

Hopefully in clinicals I can get a few more sticks and more comfortable with it. I just don't know what to do with my anxiety and lack of confidence...which is what's the enemy. Plus, Monday is IV skills check off.....which is on a mannequin but because I'm being watched and observed...my nerves will get to me....I'm sick to my stomach that I'll screw that up too.

Sorry, I just needed to vent. This is the part of nursing school that I feel like quitting sometimes but I want this and just have to keep trying.