This past week I was coming to the end of my new grad program on a med/surg floor. My first shift of three went amazing and my preceptor was extremely impressed. Then came day two, and I made the most ridiculous med error. I told my preceptor right away and the NP on the patients case was on the floor, so we also told her. I called pharmacy to see what else we could do and how we should proceed with the pt.'s medication. The pt. was fine and the error did not affect his health at all.
The fun started when I had to meet with my supervisor and the director of med/surg. I had to explain the situation numerous times and the director kept asking me to explain what I was thinking over and over again. I ended up saying I wasn't thinking and the error I made was out of stupidity and not doing the three checks of medication administration that we all learn in the first class of nursing school. I started to cry.....yes, I CRIED AT WORK. I felt so embarrassed and incompetent.
The next day my preceptor had to watch me give every medication and before I had time to do something, she would quickly say, "don't forget to do x, y, and z." I felt like I was under a microscope and my preceptor told my supervisor and director about every detail of the day. It was awful and I cried again at work.
I am working with the director of the new grad program on education and was told that many nurses overcome a med error after working with the hospital educator. My first shift is tomorrow and I feel sick when I think about going back to work. I am not sure med/surg is for me, but want to prove to my supervisor and director that I can do the job. I feel like I can't ask my preceptor, supervisor, director and new grad educator any questions because it may be taken out of context.
I enjoy working with multiple pt.'s one on one and have considered home health, or in a clinic. I also enjoy working with wounds and doing IV's, which has made me consider looking into being a PICC line nurse. My preceptor said that my interests would get boring because they would become repetitive, which I don't agree with. However, if I am not able to make it through this next week, I feel I will have a difficult time getting into a hospital.
Any words of wisdom or suggestions would be much appreciated! Thank you in advance.
