Guilt over the death of a pt

Published

I am a CNA at an LTC facility. I do doubles on the weekend. On the 7-3 shift, I was feeding a pt who was bedridden and couldn't feed himself. He was on high oxygen and had a lot of mucous in his throat. I made sure to give him small bites of mashed potatoes and ground turkey. I also gave him small sips of thickened milk to help swallow the food. He ate about half his plate and then he started coughing a little. All the while I could hear the mucous accumulating in this throat. I asked if he was okay and he said yes and then he started coughing more. I went to the nurse and told her that I fed him, he was coughing and it didn't sound good. She said she was aware of this and that I should just stop feeding him and he should be placed on hospice and they were waiting for an order from the doctor. So I take away the guy's tray who has now stopped coughing and I go to the bathroom. I come out of the bathroom and another nurse stops me and says did you hear that the pt in rm 440 just died. She said yeah apparently he was aspiring and stopped breathing. I said that was my pt!!! I immediately started walking away crying. The nurse said what are you doing, it wasn't your fault! We knew that he was dying so there's nothing you could have done it would have happened anyway. I felt like crap and though I'm not crying anymore I still feel bad.

LTC needs more caring, compassionate people like you.

sounds like you took good care of him

and that's what is needed

thanks goodness that you cared to do these things

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