Good Bye to Nursing for me...

Mulan · Jan 2, 2007

Thank you for getting the point across that I was trying to get across to Ruby Vee in my threads concerning a certain hospital in Spokane, Washington. I too, was given the "it must be MY fault that I did not get along with the nurses on this particular unit". Blame the victim, again. The fact that I have testimony from other nurses who went to work there, and were treated as shabbily as I was, seemed not to matter. The fact that I have gotten along with the staff in every other hospital, in three different states, seemed not to matter. It MUST HAVE BEEN MY FAULT.
Unfortunately, this attitude seems to permeate in certain facilities, and the nurses in these facilities take their attitudes with them not matter where they go- taking no responsibility that THEIR ATTITUDES ARE CONTRIBUTING THE THE INCREASING NUMBER OF NURSES WHO NO LONGER WANT TO WORK AT BEDSIDE NURSING, ME BEING ONE OF THEM. It is THEIR PERSONALITY THAT IS THE PROBLEM, NOT ME. That is the point that I was trying to make.
Unfortunately, these type of individuals will never accept constructive criticism that deflated their sense of self worth and self importance. If they cannot dump on new nurses, who are just trying to fit in, then they have failed. My advice is, get a life!
Lindarn, RN, BSN, CCRN
Spokane, Washington

:yeahthat:

erichRN · Jan 2, 2007

My wife has taken a vacation (for however long) after having been a nurse off and on for 35 years. She has been reading this thread with me and wants to remark that just because you want (must) quit, you are NOT some sort of failure or substandard person. For some reason there are a lot of garbage people in nursing (what's inside always comes out). But what baffles me is that even though there are so many more very nice people in nursing, the few bad ones seem to eclipse the rest and cause so much grief for so many. I've only been an RN for 5 years, but until I began reading on this site I believed I had more than my share of these experiences. I had three jobs in twenty months after graduation. I even took a manual labor job after that for 8 months to clear my head and reduce the stress. While I was in that job, I looked very hard and very carefully. I have been at the job I have now for over three years. It's not the best, but it's doable and I'm having fun. I just can't take responsiblilty for someone else's garbage anymore.

lupin · Jan 2, 2007

Healer27:

I am so sorry you have been exposed to the underside of nursing. There's a saying, "Nurses eat their young." I too was given a hard time when I first became a nurse. I got a job two weeks before graduation at a local nursing home and I quit within 30 days. When I did quit I told the DON (the third DON in that thirty day period) exactly what had caused me to leave. Not two weeks later a narc book went missing and they HARASSED me for an entire month wanting to know where it was. I hadn't even been the last person to have it, the pharmacy tech who wasted the narcs and my supervisor had been. Finally the state board of nursing called to follow up on it because they had made a suprise inspection two days after I left. When I told them about the harassment, they stated I was not the only nurse that that facility had done this to and I lodged a complaint then and there. A few months later I found out from a friend who was an aide there that they had lost their rehab and skilled certification becuase of all the problems and it turned out my supervisor had "accidentally" taken the book home to "fix some count problems".

By that time I was hired with a wonderful agency that sent me to assisted living and skilled rehab homes. I would work a few days at one facility and then the next week it was on to the next place. I just went in, did my work, and didn't have to really deal with any problems at whatever facility I was at. It helped me learn prioritizing, flexibility, and how to avoid a lot of conflict with staff. Several facilities asked for me personally and one of the DONs wrote a letter of recommendation for me when I moved to another state.

My advice is to take some time with your pregnancy and if you need to work and keep your license up to date, look at working with an agency. Many of them guarantee only a certain amount of hours and you pretty much make your own schedule. At the very least, get a subscription to a nursing magazine. They sometimes have mail-in credits for education and information for classes in your area.

If you still find yourself leaving nursing, then good luck to you. May you have a safe and wonderful pregnancy.

nizhoni · Jan 3, 2007

Dear Healer27,

Many of us have had similar experiences but from my perspective of 30+ years since graduation from my ADN program, I can tell you that it was well worth it to become an RN. I married just before my graduation in 1976 and became pregnant soon after. I found so many non-traditional ways to use my nursing education: I assisted student nurses from my university by typing and editing nursing process papers, then after my baby's birth began teaching childbirth education classes. This eventually led to assisting a local physician who was attending homebirths--and this led to my becoming a midwife. Even so, along the way, I was so grateful that I had kept that nursing license, as there were times I had to return to nursing to earn a living. My ventures into the hospital were less than fulfilling (like you, due primarily to mean-spirited managers) but at the same time I learned a lot in the process. My last L&D job ended in 1988. I have combined nursing with my midwifery since then, as I am the primary provider in our family due to my husband's severe health problems. The current combination of case manager and midwife has been working out well. There are soooo many ways of being a nurse if you are willing to think "outside the box!"

All the best to you with your pregnancy and mothering. Glad that you have decided to keep that nursing license (smart choice!). One of the biggest ways that nursing paid off was in my mothering--I was much more astute than the average parent when it came to diagnosing and treating illness.

I provided palliative care to my beloved stepfather who passed away a few days after Christmas, having suffered for five years with Alzheimer's. I was able to be helpful to him in his last days and to my family as he passed away at home . . . and yesterday I finally heard these long-awaited words from my mother, who was truly hostile to my choice of nursing as a profession three decades ago: "I'm so glad you made the choice to become a nurse!"

You'll find your niche . . . .

cookie102 · Jan 3, 2007

i am ready to "hang it up" but still a few years until i can officially retire so i must stay with it, if only there was a way to make equal amount of money

DeLana_RN, BSN, RN · Jan 3, 2007

Well, once again I have the preceptor from hell not only that but the managers In my opinion are nitpickers.

Healer, It seems that preceptors from hell are the norm in nursing - believe me, you're not alone. The first year out of school is hard, no matter where you are; it's nice to have a nice preceptor (I think are are some ), but most of us have suffered.

It's sad, and even sadder that nurses like you are already quitting before ever getting established in the profession. You went to nursing school for a reason, and I think it would be a mistake to totally write off nursing after such a short time. However, you have a wonderful reason to take a break and later reconsider (congrats!)

Best of luck to you (whatever you decide),

DeLana :)

P.S. I'm currently in orientation and my preceptor can be pretty b----y at times; however, after 8 years as a nurse I won't let it get to me anymore. Soon I'll be on my own and won't have to deal with it

buddiage · Jan 3, 2007

Congratulations on the pregnancy!
Further on down the line, it would be wise if you simply gave yourself another chance in the field of nursing. Don't throw all of your education and efforts to waste because of some stress and a few crappy preceptors who didn't believe in you.
You will succeed as a nurse if you find the inner strength and believe in yourself.

I concur- it would be such a great loss to you personally if you didn't use your education. You should and could try a doctors office, they have normal hours, you will get holidays off, and you wn't be working nights. You might even be able to get "weekends" only or something like that.

Please consider it.

And screw those pit of vipers who tripped you up as you were just comming out of it. Surely, if it were ALL bad, you would have given up when you were in clinicals.

You can do it!

mystcnurse, MSN, APRN, NP · Jan 3, 2007

There are a lot of other jobs for nurses, besides working in the hospital. What about school nursing??? Day jobs, desk jobs, etc. I know they SAY that you have to work a year in med surg first, but that is not always the case. I didn't work in a hospital my first ten years of nursing. Then, I did it more for the money, but I actually did like it (still do, at times). Don't give up your credentials. Congrats on the bambino.

kstec, LPN · Jan 3, 2007

I was just reading this and I too am a recent graduate. I graduated as a LPN in June 2006. Prior to being a nurse I worked in a hospital pharmacy. I had a lot of responsibilities. I made all the ICU, CCU, NICU, PICU drugs. I did orals and injectables (epidurals, TPN's, hyperal's). The responsibility was huge, but nothing compared to nursing. In pharmacy they were allowed appropriate staffing. I had sufficient time to make each of my drugs. We were hardly ever short staffed and I hardly ever felt truly overwhelmed. But now that I'm in nursing, it's a whole new ballgame. Even though we are the ones to administer the drugs, we are worked so short that errors are bound to happen. We have to deal with our patients, their family's, our boss', our coworkers and doctors and somehow keep our sanity. Why is it when I talk to anyone outside of the nursing profession they love their job and only occassionally feeled overwhelmed. As nurses most of them are so stressed out their ready to call it quits. I presently am an LPN and was seriously considering bridging to the RN, but due to the shortage and then the increased liability, I don't think that is something I will ever do or if so, no time soon. This may anger some people but it is not intended too. We (most) nurses go into nursing because they came from some type of dysfunction in their childhood, so they want to take care of people and feel that we are making a difference. But why in the world do we go into a profession where we are overworked, underpaid, no appreciated, have noone on our side, and ultimately are expected to act above human standards? I'm trying to figure it out??????? I thoroughly love people and have always wanted to be a nurse, but what a rude awakening. I am only human and I am only one person. Yes I realized one person can make a difference but no when you're fighting money and politics.

wessontwo · Jan 3, 2007

My nursing experiences after graduation were a lot like healer27's- I took a preceptorship in a teaching hospital's ICU right after graduation, and I was 50 at that time! After being a mental health counselor and later an administrator, becoming a nurse was a lifetime dream that soon became a nightmare. I had never worked in a hospital but was expected to automatically know how to draw blood, and my preceptor yelled at me when I said I didn't know how. It just went downhill from there. But I stuck it out there for a year and then went to work in an administrative position in LTC. I did that in three states for the next five years, and once right after we moved( my husband moves around in his job) I went to a med/surg floor for a couple of months. I left because of the constant floating to other units where they treated me VERY badly. I tell people there is a nursing shortage because no-one in their right mind would work in the conditions nurses are asked to, especially in a hospital. Our governing bodies (like the ANA) do little to help us, we have no meaningful union for collective bargaining and the Boards of Nursing cave to every request of short-sighted politicians. I can't understand how teachers have a strong union and we have nothing.I am retired now, and have terrible back problems from the heavy lifting I did, with no recourse to any one place to blame for it. I keep my license up because you never know, I might need a job one day. So I would advise anyone to keep up your license and if you want to, try another area of nursing. Or be the hero we need and organise us!

Memerson2000 · Jan 3, 2007

It sounds like you've had a difficult time, but my eye is mainly caught by the part where you say you were moved to another floor, found a preceptor who was great, they wanted you to work evenings, you left. The first year of nursing is often less than ideal in terms of scheduling; a lot of us worked nights and every holiday in the first year out. It's lovely when you can hold out for something more convenient; flip side is, SOMEBODY has to work those shifts; it's the nature of the job.

The fact that you don't necessarily have to work and that your husband can support the family seems to have informed your decision making. You'd be surprised at what you can tolerate (and later be happy that you put up with it and found a way to overcome it) when you have to earn a living.

There's a spiritual axiom I learned a long time ago that goes like this: "Whever I am disturbed, whatever may seem to its cause, there is something wrong in me and not in my external conditions." When I first read that, my reaction was to sputter, "BUT...". How can it be? It's obvious the other guy is the bad guy. Okay, do I want to be right, or do I want to be happy? There is actually a lot of power in saying that it's your own fault--you can't CHANGE the other guy, but you have the power to change yourself. And when you change yourself, inevitably, the situation changes; the other guy often changes, too. Sometimes the only change you make in yourself is not to let them get to you. Other times, when feeling attacked, I'll pick out the thread of truth in someone's attack--their criticism of me that I know might be valid--and I work on fixing that part of myself.

Somebody told me, "Anytime you're pointing your finger at someone, over what they've done, look at your hand and notice that there are three more fingers pointing back at you."

I hope this doesn't sound unduly harsh, because that's not the way I intend it. I'm just sharing some ideas that have really worked for me. I absolutely love nursing--it continues to challenge and frustrate and enlighten me and even when I'm just shoveling sand against the tide, I feel like what we're doing is meaningful.

Nurses ARE first-class whiners. It reminds me of parents complaining about their kids--but hey, just because they drive you crazy doesn't mean you don't love them. We reserve the right to complain!

ShelNewGrad · Jan 3, 2007

Hi there

First, Happy New Year and congrats on your new baby :balloons: .

I have had a very similar experience to yours. I have been working on a busy med/surg telemetry/neurology floor and I am so tired of nursing. It is so much work and people can be so mean & rude, including some RNs.

I left my med/surg job at the end of 2006 - that was MY xmas gift :lol2: I was getting paid a lot of money but I decided to quit and do what makes me happy because at the end of the days, that's MOST IMPORTANT. Additionally, I left because I was put in a tough spot to choose between taking care of my family versus work. I chose what mattered most, MY FAMILY. Now, I will work part-time as a RN and have opened up my own business.

Just some advice since I have been in your shoes, do what makes YOU happy and take care of your new family because that's priority.

Take care and nursing has a lot of different specialties so dont give up, ok.

Good luck to you!!!

ShelNewGrad

Well, the start of a new year and I'm kissing nursing
good bye after only 5 short months. I graduated in may and started at a hospital in august. My very first preceptor was a nightmare, on my 3rd day on the floor she said I was too slow and put me down in front of other
nurses or whoever was in distance of hearing her. At one
point she even said, "well, I have her she know's nothing I have to show her everything." So being enthusiastic I decided NOT to let it get to me and proceeded to take her C*ap for another couple of weeks. At which time I was moved to a different floor with a preceptor who was great and I learned alot from. PRoblem was at this hospital IF
I wanted to stay I'd have to take a evening position. SO I left a found a hosptial closer to home on days. Well, once again I have the preceptor from hell not only that but the managers In my opinion are nitpickers. ON my first day on the floor they wrote up a nurse who was in charge of making sure all the phones were back at the end of the day, for not having a phone returned. (someone took one home accidentally).. I found this ridiculous, it's a busy med/surg floor with an 8:1 patient ratio and they are worried about PHONES???? I could go on and on about the other horrors but it would be to long.
Long story short I've decide to quit. Luckily I don't NEED the job to support myself or I wouldn't be able to leave. my hubby makes a decent salary. I do feel bad placing all the financial burden on him but I'm planning on just picking up a admin position somewhere. I don't care if I'm making half the money I jsut want to be happy. I'm so SICK of being stressed going into work, stressed coming home, worrying about this, being stressed on the floor. To me its just not worth it. My hubby is worried that I'll change my mind and want to come back to nursing but won't be able to after leaving 2 prior positions. bUt seriously I can't imagine feeling this way.
I also just found out I'm expecting my first child and I really can't imagine the stress level as well as not eating/drinking/peeing an entire shift is good. So I'm gone. I give up, I give in, I just feel like I can't do it. I'm thinking I'm just not meant to be in nursing, or i woudn't have just kept inheriting bad circumstances and preceptors from hell.
Well, I'd love to hear if anyone else has left nursing? come back and any other thoughts you all might have.
Hope this is a good new year for all.