any friendly advice??

[TrishaDL]

I am a PDN nurse and my clients are children with special needs. I have one family that i have primarily worked for the last, well almost 2 years. The mother tells me all of the time how greatful she is that I am here, and in this field there is a high turnover rate so this family has seen nurses come and go. I had to quit once before but that was due to the company that Im with and their unwavering need to jack up my paychecks. I have the only income so that really hurts when you are missing half of your pay check or not receiving one at all.....ok back on track, I know the family very well, have seen clients highs and lows, have done alot of worrying and brainstorming and caring with mom. Well Its time for me to move on so i can utilize other skills and learn more! My husband is also pushing hard on this too as he would like to see me advance and use my full potential. Also clients mother is thinking that the hours that client is receiving for nursing will be getting cut with Medicaid but has reassured me that they will let the other part time nurses hours go before they do mine. I reassured mom that i am greatful that she would do that but should not worry about me having a job! Lol nurses will always be needed! Soo after all that...lol is there an easy way to break the news that I am going to move on? I just feel like I will be letting her down! She already has soo much on her plate and now she is going to have to find a new nurse! I know honesty is the best policy. Maybe this is just a personal struggle for me. Lol I know she will be so dissapointed! Should i wait until I have something lined up and go with the norm of the two weeks notice or give her thae heads up that I am looking? I know she will be so stressed! GRR. Lol any advice would be welcome! I am pretty sure I know what I should do, but a fresh view never hurts!

[nursemartin00]

I can relate: been there and done that!

Its hard not to get close to your clients family. You come into their home and life and next thing you know ~ its hard not to be so attached!

You are in a difficult situation that from the outside should be easy but its torture.

Give your notice, tell Mom, and continue your shifts as usual. Sounds easy right? Bottom line is its not! It creates an awful tense environment. No matter what you do, they always feel betrayed.

I had a FT client for 3 years and wanted a change for my skills sake and even though Mom said she totally understood she spent my last month trying to change my mind until she finally got it..... Then she was angry! Now, about 1 year later, ( yes, we have stayed very close with Facebook and such) she admits she was hurt and wondered if she would of been better to me if I would of stayed.

NO! She was a stressed out Mom, as most of them are, who tried so very hard to accommodate the nurses cuz they have had so many. We remain great friends and through several conversations she understands that it was a professional choice and not to take it personal.

Be honest! Good luck.

[nursel56]

(just pulled part of your post here)

I reassured mom that i am greatful that she would do that but should not worry about me having a job! Lol nurses will always be needed! Soo after all that...lol is there an easy way to break the news that I am going to move on?

No, there is no easy way to do that. Some families react rather angrily, and most will lay a gigantic guilt trip on you -- and in some ways I can't blame them. People who have never worked PDN will sometimes criticize us for the kind of emotions you're feelng right now but honestly I don't see how it's possible that you can work in someone's home day in and day out for months or even years and stay completely detached.

I understand they will be upset, but we can't allow that to derail our own lives, work and home. I'd ask you how long you think it might take to secure another job in your area before I'd recommend when to tell her.

If it will be over 30 days I wouldn't want the family to be on tender-hooks wondering when the separation will occur. These parents already live with so much anxiety it would be a judgement call as to when you break the final news. Although, 2 weeks is standard, so if you need to leave in 2 weeks you shouldn't feel guilty about it.

Hope that helps a little! Best wishes to you!