difficult coworker

[grammied50]

rn that i supervise appears to be passive-aggressive,does not talk to me,is very critical of my supervisory role and what i do. is very vocal to other staff members.last shift was very verbal and loud with comments about my role.(in front of staff,md)she will not discuss this with me or my director.she claims i am harrassing her.she has accused me of being racist(she is asian),not doing my work(plus other complaints).i have gone to admin but my manager does not handle conflict very well.this behavior is consistent over the last 21/2 yrs.i have adequate documentation for my files.on numerous occaisions i or my director have tried talking to her. for the most part she yells,cries,and is very hysterical. it is not in the hands of human resources. her behavior is disrupting the unit and pt. care. i have never experienced this type of behavior before and don't know how to protect myself.my director is leaving and appears not to want to be involved. i may very well end up working everyday with this rn. i don't have a problem with her,she has one with me and won't settle/negotiate any peace. please give me some advice.i have worked in critical care areas for years and never run across this type of behavior in the past. thanks!

[oramar]

This sounds really wierd but I got a feeling about this situation. I have been a human being for 50+ years and a nurse for 30+ years and these feeling I get are always right. This person you describe is reacting to something that has nothing to do with you or the place you work. She has some sort of issue that she is playing out at work that has no relationship to work. Since she is focusing on you so I wonder if you do not remind her in some way of somebody or something that happened to her or someone she knows. If you do not have support of your manager I do not know what to tell you to do. Most people will tell you to try to talk to her privately but it sounds like you have already tried that. Once I knew a fellow employee who hated a manager because the manager had the same last name as someone who had hurt the employee very badly. It is not really logical or reasonable but is the way humans being behave. The poor manager was mystified just like you are, it took a herculean effort on the managers part to get the person into consuling. Good luck and good grief.