Burnout? Or something else?

[NurseK523, LVN]

Hello All,

I have come to this website for years reading about so many topics and input I decided tonight it was time to make an account, and ask for some input because I am currently going through what feels like a rollercoaster of emotions and I'm unsure if this has to do with working nights, or something else...

A little info. I moved south four years ago, and I have been working nights ever since 2007. Including when I moved here four years ago. I currently work for Hospice, and I work 3 twelve hour shifts one week and 4 twelve hour shifts the following week 7pm-730am. I feel like all I ever do is sleep and go to work. Even when I am off I am exhausted, it takes everything in me just to get out of bed and do anything, even things I enjoy (classic signs of depression I know) But I still feel very happy when I am with my significant other, still enjoy doing things together and when I do what I love it makes me happy. I'm just so...tired all the time.

I am also more irritable than ever when it's about two weeks away from that time of the month for me...again I have no idea if this has to do with working nights, if these are signs of PMDD or what the heck is going on. I get irritable as I said, sad, angry all for what seems like such minor inconveniences...

All I know is this isn't me. I love what I do for work, but lately the idea of being cancelled for a shift sounds so much more appealing than coming into work. A year ago I was working 5-6 shifts a week, as I had a goal I was working on reaching. I was driven and nothing was standing in my way. What happened? Where did that fire go?

This breaks my heart all at the same time because I have SOOOO much to be grateful for, and I am constantly telling others "find the silver lining.", "there's good in every situation even if it's bad." So...I'm sort of feeling like a hypocrite. Everyday something is bothering me and bringing me down. I want to go back to when I focused more on feeling good, and the things and people that made me happy. Again, what happened?

I am 32 years old, I find out in another week about being accepted into nursing school, but I don't know how I could be successful while feeling this way, something has to change. I know that more than ever. I can't live my best life while feeling this way. I have made an appointment with my doctor to have blood work done, and discuss these symptoms with her and see what to do next.

Just trying to find out if anyone else has experienced anything similar to this while working nights? I am tempted to switch my hours ASAP because part of me is certain that not getting enough sleep is affecting my mental health. Is the night shift just finally catching up with me?

Thank you for your time and any input is appreciated!!!

[barcode120x, RN, NP]

It could be many things, but it would seem to be the hours and possibly the work setting (hospice). I've had several former coworkers who could not survive nightshift for the life of them. It was ruining their daily routines as well as their relationships and family life. Although you personally may like the actual work hours and work environment, your body is telling you otherwise and you should pay attention to it. Last thing you want to do is to go into nursing school already burned out. Life is only going to get harder when nursing school starts. At this point, you haven't even reached your actual nursing career. Definitely need to revisit your options in terms of work, how to destress, and how to get out of this burnout.

[NurseK523, LVN]

Thank you very much for your input!

Yes I certainly love what I do for work but...feeling this way on a regular basis is to say the least, exhausting. I look more forward to my days off rather than the days I have to come into work, because I just feel so...off. That's the best way I can explain it. I am exhausted after every shift, because I give so much of myself. My patients deserve that. But there's nothing left for me. I have no energy to do what gives my life meaning, and even when I'm off, all I want to do is stay in bed.

I have been working as a CNA since 2007, I took my time with deciding about going to nursing school because I wanted to be sure. I want to be a nurse because I want to do more for people who need help, when they are in my care...but the way I feel now, all I can think is "How would that even be possible?"

Thank you again for your input!