how do you do it?

How do you guys deal with the death and the dying of the young? I am an adult open heart recovery/icu nursing and my patient die and while its difficult to deal with I can cope by knowing usually the person has lived their life and its time for them to move onto where they need to be. Last week my friend's younger sister died from cancer, while it was an 'excpected death' it wasn't at the same time because she was just 16. It just got me to thinking how do you deal with your patient's that you lose?

lora

Unfortunately...you have to deal with it. When i started on peds, when we lost a child, i was devastated. I work in a large county hospital and back them we had alot of HIV/AIDS patients and we lost most of them. I have had them pass in my arms. When i had my own children, it was even harder on me. I remember times that i was physically unable to function after losing a kid i treated for months. I realized that wasnt helping me or my family. I try to keep it together after the death and move on. It sounds cold hearted, but it works for me. I cry and grieve, i just dont let it disable me anymore. Unfortunately, the closer you get to the pat/family, the harder it is on you.

Somehow, you find the strength. I am a very sensitive person (my grandmother used to call me bladder eyes), but I somehow found the strength to be there for the families. Sure, I've cried, and its okay to cry - I think families appreciate it more when you cry with them - especially when you lose your first child. It gets hard when you take care of a chld with a long-term illness and get close to them and their family; its like losing someone in your own family. Its not easy and not everyone can do it. I hope this helps.