Rules For Quick & Easy Housekeeping

Nov 07, 2005 10:44 AM

by Franemtnurse

Platinum Member

Vacuuming too often weakens the carpet fibers. Say this with a serious face, and shudder delicately whenever anyone mentions Carpet Fresh.
Dust bunnies cannot evolve into dust rhinos when disturbed. Rename the area under the couch "The Galapagos Islands" and claim an ecological exemption.
Layers of dirty film on windows and screens provide a helpful filter against harmful and aging rays from the sun. Call it an SPF factor of 5 and leave it alone.
Cobwebs artfully draped over lampshades reduces the glare from the bulb, thereby creating a romantic atmosphere. If your husband points out that the light fixtures need dusting, simply look affronted and exclaim, "What? And spoil the mood?"
In a pinch, you can always claim that the haphazard tower of unread magazines and newspapers next to your chair provides the valuable Feng Shui aspect of a tiger, thereby reducing your vulnerability. Roll your eyes when you say this.
Explain the mound of pet hair brushed up against the doorways by claiming you are collecting it there to use for stuffing hand sewn play animals for underprivileged children.
If unexpected company is coming, pile everything unsightly into one room and close the door. As you show your guests through your tidy home, rattle the door knob vigorously, fake a growl and say, "I'd love you to see our Den, but Fluffy hates to be disturbed and the shots are SO expensive."
If dusting is REALLY out of control, simply place a showy urn on the coffee table and insist that "THIS is where Grandma wanted us to scatter her ashes..."
Don't bother repainting. Simply scribble lightly over a dirty wall with an assortment of crayons, and try to muster a glint of tears as you say, "Junior did this the week before that unspeakable accident... I haven't had the heart to clean it..."
Mix one-quarter cup pine-scented household cleaner with four cups of water in a spray bottle. Mist the air lightly. Leave dampened rags in conspicuous locations. Develop an exhausted look, throw yourself onto the couch, and sigh, "I clean and I clean and I still don't get anywhere..."

sharann · Nov 07, 2005, 11:54 PM

Re: Rules For Quick & Easy Housekeeping

LOL!Very funny Fran

AussieTina · Nov 08, 2005, 02:09 AM

Re: Rules For Quick & Easy Housekeeping

I had planned to clean the house today, but now i can see that by playing on my computer, lazing in bed and reading a book...... I was actually being environmentaly friendly, concious of the health of my kids and extending the life of my carpets as well

thanks Fran, i no longer feel guilty :hatparty:

New To Site	Need Help	Quick Links
Create An Account General Site Map allnurses.com Journals Terms Of Service Privacy Policy Testimonials Meet Our Staff Advertising Information	Information Center & FAQ Boards of Nursing How-To Video Tutorials Did you forget your password? Compare Membership Contact allnurses.com Text Version Mark All Sections As Read	United States Nursing International Nursing Nursing Specialty Advanced Practice Nursing Critical Care Nursing Nursing Specialties Get In Touch... Find Us On Facebook Follow Us On Twitter

Rules For Quick & Easy Housekeeping

Rules For Quick & Easy Housekeeping

Nursing News

lawsuit - But don't most RN's work through breaks/lunch...

Patient Evaluation of Retail Clinic Care

The hard to reach on-call doctor, and its effects on...

Woman charged with passing off prescription drug as...

Man in "Vegetative State" was conscious for 23...

Interesting article on ThedaCare's Collaborative Care Model

Possible breakthrough regarding MS

16th Philly area hospital to stop delivering babies: Mercy...

Really interesting article on Indian open hearts

High-Tech Pump Does What Her Heart Can't

Available Topics (tags)