I like googling..don't u? - page 2

Like many others on this board, google is my search engine of choice. bob... Read More

  1. by   NurseShell
    Excellent point!
  2. by   RN-PA
    :chuckle :chuckle :chuckle

    Groundskeeper Willie's (The Simpsons) term for the French:
    "Cheese-eatin' surrender monkeys"
  3. by   2ndCareerRN
    Just a minor point, but are you aware that america has never won a war without outside help? NEVER

    I am not entirely sure that statement is correct.

    Let's look at the War of 1812 (2nd War for Independence), the Spanish-American War, the Mexican-American War, and the little known Philippine-American War, just for starters.

    I can't find much mention of US allies in these conflicts. I am continuing to look though.

    I will get back with a more definitive answer, or perhaps someone else will be able to find something.

    bob
  4. by   passing thru
    I think those are "wars" we initiated to gain land. I know the Spanish -American war was., we blew up a ship in their harbor and blamed it on them to start the war. there was a article in the paper about it recently. and the mexican war, when we attacked vera cruz, wish full thinking to grab more mexican land.
  5. by   J-RN student
    :chuckle :roll :chuckle
  6. by   2ndCareerRN
    I think those are "wars" we initiated to gain land. I know the Spanish -American war was., we blew up a ship in their harbor and blamed it on them to start the war.
    I hate it when a humor thread takes a sudden left turn and becomes more serious....but...

    I will only suggest you do a google search on the "wars" mentioned and see what the wars were really fought over. I will not debate it until the facts are straight.

    For the "ship" that was blown up. Nobody knows. It was the USS Maine, one of the first US battleships. I will give you a site as a starting point. http://www.history.navy.mil/faqs/faq71-1.htm

    I only ask you do a decent search, and not rely on one source of info (newspaper) to base your argument on.

    bob
  7. by   Hardknox
    Gallic Wars - Lost. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian.

    Hundred Years War - Mostly lost, saved at last by female schizophrenic who inadvertently creates The First Rule of French Warfare; "France's armies are victorious only when not led by a Frenchman."

    Italian Wars - Lost. France becomes the first and only country to ever lose two wars when fighting Italians.

    Wars of Religion - France goes 0-5-4 against the Huguenots.

    Thirty Years War - France is technically not a participant, but manages to get invaded anyway. Claims a tie on the basis that eventually the other participants started ignoring her.

    War of Devolution - Tied. Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots as chapeaux.

    The Dutch War - Tied.

    War of the Augsburg League/King William's War/French and Indian War - Lost, but claimed as a tie. Three ties in a row induces deluded Frogophiles the world over to label the period as the height of French military power.

    War of the Spanish Succession - Lost. The War also gave the French their first taste of a Marlborough, which they have loved ever since.

    American Revolution - In a move that will become quite familiar to
    future Americans, France claims a win even though the English colonists saw far more action. This is later known as "de Gaulle Syndrome", and leads to the Second Rule of French Warfare; "France only wins when America does most of the fighting."

    French Revolution - Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French.

    The Napoleonic Wars - Lost. Temporary victories (remember the First Rule!) due to leadership of a Corsican, who ended up being no match for a British footwear designer.

    The Franco-Prussian War - Lost. Germany first plays the role of drunk Frat boy to France's ugly girl home alone on a Saturday night.

    World War I - Tied and on the way to losing, France is saved by the United States. Thousands of French women find out what it's like to not only sleep with a winner, but one who doesn't call her "Fraulein." Sadly, widespread use of condoms by American forces forestalls any improvement in the French bloodline.

    World War II - Lost. Conquered French liberated by the United States and Britain just as they finish learning the Horst Wessel Song.

    War in Indochina - Lost. French forces plead sickness, take to bed with the Dien Bien Flu.

    Algerian Rebellion - Lost. Loss marks the first defeat of a western army by a Non-Turkic Muslim force since the Crusades, and produces the First Rule of Muslim Warfare; "We can always beat the French." This rule is identical to the First Rules of the Italians, Russians, Germans, English, Dutch, Spanish, Vietnamese and Esquimaux.

    War on Terrorism - France, keeping in mind its recent history, surrenders to Germans and Muslims just to be safe. Attempts to surrender to Vietnamese ambassador fail after he takes refuge in a McDonald's.


    I got this from Kevin McHugh's "And now for something entirely different" thread. It's HUMOR!!

    Here's another joke :

    How did the French advertise surplus military rifles after WWII? "Never been used. Dropped only once ."

    Keep in mind: My grandfather was French.:kiss
    Last edit by Hardknox on Feb 19, '03

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