terrified to return to work after breast ca

  1. hi fellow nurses! I am 32, I was dx with invasive DC in July (stage 1) BRCA 2pos, had double mast, reconstructive surgery (x2!) and on my 3rd AC chemo treatment. Had a miscarriage in May, right before my dx. Was working on BUSY and very stressful med surg floor handling 7-10 patients overnight. Made my first med error am after I got dx and decided for pt safety to take personal leave until my surgery- was not willing to hurt someone due to my distraction. I didnt harm anyone, brought my mistake to everyone's attention, and mostly felt terrible. They gave me a coaching form and put a notation that I was having personal health issues at the time.

    I have been cleared to rtw after december 1st, as i will only be on taxol then, and will try to get my old job back in January--I have kept a good relationship with the sv and ed director (who actually came to my surgery!). The hard thing is I was only on the job 7 months (graduated in December 2010) and had just started to get my wings. I am terrified to go back, the med error and the cancer dx really shattered me and my confidence. I know I need to jump back in, was wondering if anyone has any tips on rtw after a crisis like this? I am seeing a counselor next week to try and work through coping skills to handle all of this. Any advice is much appreciated.
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    About kbear1729

    Joined: Mar '11; Posts: 9; Likes: 2


  3. by   DennRN
    You sound like a fighter, you made it through nursing school, took accountability for your med error, had the personal insight to put your patients before yourself, battled cancer and all the difficult treatments, and you are still going strong.

    It's time to look down from the mountain you have climbed and gain a little perspective. You can do this, nothing has stopped you yet.

    Stay strong,
  4. by   leslie :-D
    i have to agree with dennis.
    you need to put it in perspective...you have fought and survived cancer!
    you made a med error r/t your distraction...very valid reason.

    even with a lg pt load, just prioritize, take your time, and refuse to be pressured.
    perhaps considering part time would be less burdensome?

    you've been through more than many.
    recognize that, and then give yourself the much-deserved credit for what you have endured.
    there is much to be admired.

    only the best...